Tag psychology

Set A Contest Date And Stick To It!

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Shut up and do it

I am writing this blog post in honor of those of you who have a tendency to constantly change your proposed competition date. I am not talking about situations in which your coach advises you to select a different contest as a means to give you sufficient time to be in proper condition. Instead, I am talking about competitors (new or seasoned) who keep changing proposed contest dates for a multitude of reasons, and end up frustrating coaches, friends and family as a result. Sometimes the reason for pushing back plans to compete may be solely financial, which is understandable since competition expenses can be quite high, especially for national level amateur NPC events and international IFBB Pro events. However, some people fall into a dangerous and self-sabotaging habit of pushing contest dates back because they are anxious and afraid of stepping onstage. This fear of competing is often accompanied by self-sabotaging behavior which includes eating too many mini-cheat and full cheat meals, skipping cardio, and skipping parts of workouts or entire workouts. In my experience as a coach and trainer, I can smell this behavior from a mile away, and always get confirmation when I see progress pictures. Sometimes the competitor is so ashamed of his or her deviation from the prep program that progress pics aren’t taken and sent over to me.

I honestly wish I could completely ignite that flame of INTENTION and DRIVE which is essential for success in competing in every single one of the clients I have worked with, but unfortunately, one or two have slipped through the cracks as a result of their defeatist thoughts and behaviors. Complete focus is critical for success as a competitor. Every dip, blip, obstacle, bad day and negative thought needs to be pushed aside. Watch any competitor who has an eye on the prize at all times, and you will see someone who never gives up, who doesn’t switch from one contest to another as a goal date, and who almost moves like a machine, determined to get things done. The phrase “I CAN’T” doesn’t exist for the successful competitor.

Make a decision to stick to the plan. Don’t deviate. Quit overthinking and analyzing. Get into a groove and stick with it. Be a beast. Be a machine.

FOCUS!

Pushing Away Fears And Slaying The Dragon

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389009
There is no question that I am a chronic overachiever and a very stubborn and determined woman. As a result of these personality traits, I have been able to accomplish every large goal I have set in front of me. However, the process of making my dreams come to fruition has, on occasion, been peppered by self-doubt and procrastination. I know that I have a definite fear of failure and of being average, both of which are traits commonly found in the fitness and bodybuilding industry, and that is part of the reason why I find the industry completely irresistible. However (and this is also quite common in the industry), I have also suffered from a fear of success, and know all too well that such a fear can be even more crippling than any other fear.

If I were to dissect my journey to an IFBB Pro Card through a filter of fear of success, I can see that although I never really wavered from chasing that goal, certain thoughts floated through my head at times which threatened to derail me from my focus. The most prominent aspect of my fear of success was the concern that I might not deserve to become a Pro. It seems strange now, especially since I have been a Pro for almost two years, but I definitely remember thinking that maybe I didn’t have what it took to be a Pro, especially when first place national finishes were stacking up for me without the final reward of IFBB Professional Status. I remember hoping and wishing that the next national contest would be “the one” that would make me a Pro, but in the back of my mind, there was always that kernel of doubt that I didn’t deserve such a reward, and that somehow, I couldn’t deliver what the IFBB expected in their Pros.

Thankfully, everything changed in April of 2013, when my mindset shifted dramatically. Instead of thinking that I wanted a Pro Card and how I wished it would happen, I decided that I ALREADY WAS A PRO and began to embody the attitude that Pros had. Interestingly enough, my attitude change also coincided with the best physique of my life. I trained like a complete machine, never once allowing myself to get rattled or distracted by anything that threatened to sabotage my belief in myself. I was no longer afraid of success. From April until July of 2013, I kept using the hashtag “alreadyPro” to keep myself on track, and it worked like a charm, because on July 6, 2013, I reached my goal and became an IFBB Pro.

In the back of my mind, I was afraid of how things would change once I reached my big goal, and of how I might change as a result of the new status. Reflecting on that now, I fully realize how ridiculous that concern was, because I am still the same person, just with four awesome letters after my name. I had a similar concern when I was in medical school and concerned about how I would change as a person when I finally became a doctor. Though I know that the advanced degree made me somewhat more reserved, I still retained the sarcastic sense of humor I always had and was still just Stacey. I am no better than anyone else because of what I have accomplished, nor has the core of who I am changed in any way. I have been given more opportunities since achieving success in the world of bodybuilding and fitness, and the climate of my daily life has shifted, but all of it has been extremely positive.
knight fighting dragon
On another note, I remember one aspect of my fear of success with the Pro Card hunt which had been a minor concern during my journey, but which became more compelling AFTER I had reached my goal. The day that I won my Pro Card was one of the most incredible days of my life, and I found myself floating on a cloud in a state of wonder, disbelief, elation and relief for a couple of weeks after that event. Then suddenly, I was struck with the realization that since I had slain the beast and finally succeeded in getting that Pro Card, I no longer had a goal to chase. The sword had to be placed in the scabbard and put away. Once that realization set in, I went into a funk for months, and my body followed suit by retaining water and exhibiting signs of metabolic damage. Instead of feeling victorious, I was depressed because I didn’t know what to chase after anymore. I was able to move on by setting new goals, and surprised myself by changing the game plan and focusing on non-contest related pursuits. This shift in goals has created a whole new set of fears and challenges, but my past successes have strengthened my belief in my abilities, and I now feel confident that I will accomplish every one of my new goals.

Get Out Of Your Own Way

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success-churchill-550x240Have you ever considered the possibility that you are standing in your own way when it comes to achieving success in your life? Yes, you heard me right. You might not have even known that there was such a thing as a fear of success, and if not, you probably aren’t aware of how a fear of success can sabotage your efforts at getting ahead and put you on a short course to failure.

Though we may crave success deeply and feel driven to set specific goals to get us there, we may cripple ourselves by harboring a feeling that we don’t deserve to have success, or we may question our own abilities. Self-defeating thoughts like, “What if I fail?”, or “Maybe I don’t deserve to be successful” may fester in one’s mind. However, some people entertain an even more frightening thought which is “What if I succeed?” and may be so paralyzed by that fear that they talk themselves out of pursuing a goal which gives them purpose, joy and passion. Suddenly, the lure of success sours in the face of one’s own fears.

The fear of success is more powerful than the fear of failure because the former can trap individuals into established patterns which are comfortable and which prevent the movement and growth necessary to achieve success. The road to success, after all, is unpredictable and forces people out of their comfort zones. It demands tireless efforts which at times may be stalled by roadblocks, and those obstacles may stack up or appear at critical times when the temptation to give up is immense. As daunting as such challenges are in the pursuit of success, they must be overcome if the goal is to be attained.

A fear of success can manifest as procrastination, whereupon projects may be put on hold and excuses made about why there is no time to complete them. Feelings of guilt may take hold if you happen to attain a certain level of success which eludes your peers, friends or family. You may worry that success will in some ways change you and your environment. Though you may lament your current situation and crave big changes that would serve as markers of success, you might find the idea of all those changes incredibly distressing.

The road to success is also often a lonely one in which you may feel lost, perhaps because others may not understand your journey, or because you may be traveling in uncharted waters with no one to lead the way or guide you. There may be haters who try to derail you from your master plan, which is usually a good sign since it is an indication that you are doing something which is perceived as a threat to your competition. You might also think that once you become successful, somehow that success won’t be sustainable and that the proverbial coach will turn back into a pumpkin.

Success will usually put a spotlight on you and you will get attention. Some of you may believe that the attention is great, but when all eyes are on you, scrutinizing every move you make, you may find that it is incredibly distressing. Success comes with responsibilities which may frighten and intimidate you, and you may feel incredible pressure to prove your worth as a result of that boost in visibility. Contrast that with being ensconced in a comfortable pattern which provides a predictable environment, and you can see why so many people chicken out and drop their big goals. Once you achieve your goal and become a success, the goal you were chasing after becomes irrelevant because the beast has been vanquished. The taste of victory may be sweet, but life may lose its meaning and purpose in the aftermath of such an accomplishment.

There are a number of things you can do to maintain your enthusiasm and focus while carving a path to success:

Keep sight of your goals and purpose – Not only is it important to write down specific goals so that you have a blueprint of how you will achieve success, it is also essential to review those goals regularly to make sure that you stay on track and remember the purpose which drives your efforts. I recommend reviewing your master goals list at least once a week.

Gain knowledge – If you sense that your knowledge base is lagging, invest in educational pursuits which will add credibility and push you towards your goals faster. For example, talk to experts in the field you are trying to excel in, read books on pertinent subjects and take courses. Remember that your heroes can eventually become your rivals if you learn from them and pattern your behavior after them.

Become inspired by the people who believe in you – Chances are that you have people around you (spouse, family members, coworkers, fans) who completely believe in you, are inspired by you, and want to see you succeed. Though you may feel pressure to succeed and a sense of obligation as a result of this, you can focus on the enthusiasm which they have for you and allow it to wash over you and motivate you.

Keep a gratitude journal – It can be so easy to complain about one’s situation and play the victim when things aren’t going as planned, but such behavior only does harm when trying to stay motivated in achieving goals. Shift the focus instead onto all the wonderful things, people and other blessings you have in your life and allow them to fortify your resolve to move forward.

How To Beat Down Excuses That Derail You From Your Fitness Goals

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Originally published on RxGirl on Wednesday, 07 May 2014

http://www.rxmuscle.com/rx-girl-articles/10839-how-to-beat-down-excuses-that-derail-you-from-your-fitness-goals.html
excuse
I am grieving as I write this, because a very dear friend whose end of life care I was assisting in just passed away less than 24 hours ago. Though I am very rattled by this, I made sure to hit the gym first thing this morning, and I ate clean all day, packing and carrying my meals, with only one transgression which was a bottle of cold sake I had promised to myself and my friend once he had passed on. No matter how rough life is, I will not jeopardize all the hard work I put into building muscle and sculpting a physique that I could proudly display on the IFBB Pro stage this year.

A similar situation occurred with one of my clients whose father had suddenly died. Instead of making a plethora of excuses, avoiding training and abandoning her meal plan, she told me she wanted to channel her grief into her contest prep program, and so she did. She honored her father, continued to plug away at work, and took care of two small children while still honoring her commitment to herself and her fitness goals, and for that she is a true warrior.

Illness and death of a loved one are difficult to handle when one is in full contest prep mode or adopting a full blown fitness overhaul, but thankfully rather rare. The more common culprit in fitness plans falling by the wayside is the day to day life craziness that always threatens to pull us off our path. If we are not diligent and consistent about sticking to a regimen regardless of how hectic things get, a journey to ultimate fitness can dissolve into a jumble of self-doubt, fear and excuses. The most common pattern I see in competitors is one in which effective time management is lacking, resulting in missed workouts and meal prep that never happens. Let’s face it: we are ALL busy, but when one is determined and consistent, it is possible to adhere to a fitness plan or contest prep regimen.

I caution ladies (and guys, too) to avoid slipping into occasional rationalizations like, “Oh, I’m too tired to lift tonight…I’ll do a double lift tomorrow,” or “a couple of quick meals through Taco Bell isn’t really going to throw me off my prep,” because such rationalizations can develop into a regular pattern which will sabotage one’s fitness efforts. Please do NOT turn into one of those ladies who pushes a contest date back repeatedly because you don’t feel ready. Is it that you don’t feel ready, or that you are constantly throwing roadblocks in your own way by caving into peer pressure and eating unhealthy foods, drinking alcohol, getting insufficient sleep and going through the motions when you train? You need to ask yourself if your lack of discipline, whether expressed by putting yourself in certain social situations, binging on unhealthy foods at home because you are frustrated with your slow progress, or not making the time to prep and pack your meals regularly, is getting you the results you really want.
Stop-Making-Excuses1
A repatterning must occur when excuses begin to creep across your mind. Instead of thinking that a binge could count as one admittedly huge cheat meal, think of how you will end up feeling after binging. You belly will be distended, you will physically feel sluggish and weak, I am willing to bet your self-esteem will sink. So why do it in the first place? Keep tempting foods out of your kitchen, and remind yourself of your fitness goals. If you go to events or dinners, consider packing your food and bringing it with you.

People have grown so accustomed to me bringing my own food that they don’t even blink when they see me with my food cooler bag. I have attended medical dinners with my food bag in tow, consuming clean food while my colleagues dove into meat selections with sauces, heavy starch dishes, and decadent desserts. To be honest, when I see how my colleagues look, I am thankful that I practice such clean eating.

If you tend to make excuses about getting to the gym for workouts, remember your GOAL. If you need to refer to images of people whom you aspire to be like, then do it. Pack your workout gear in a bag and keep it in your car if you have trouble motivating yourself to get to the gym once you get home from work. Take the energy you would put into making excuses and get to the gym right after work! Also be sure to schedule your workouts so that they become a priority in your life.

Be consistent, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, and you will ultimately attain the fitness goals you seek.

What Color IS THAT Dress? The Tumblr Dress That Created A Stir

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Who would have thought that a global debate would ensue over the colors of a dress posted on Tumblr? Nevertheless, that is precisely what occurred last week. Whether you are in the white and gold camp (70% of people are), or in the blue and black camp, you are subject to variables such as the distribution of rods and cones in your eyes, the lighting in the room, and the screen you are viewing the dress from.

Some scientists have surmised that people who see the dress as white and gold are more light sensitive and have diminished vision in dimly lit rooms, while the blue and black group have more active cones in the retina. This may be true but hasn’t been completely proven. Lighting also plays a factor, and since darker eyes have more melanin pigment than lighter colored irises, less light enters the eye.

I first viewed THE DRESS after sitting in my living room for four hours, near my sliding glass door, staring at a computer screen. The environment I was in, combined with ocular fatigue, altered my perception of the dress, and I could only see it as white and gold. I kept reading about how others could make the colors flip from one combination to the other, but I wasn’t able to do it. Hell, I didn’t pick up anything more than a bluish hue to the white which I saw in the dress.

Then I encountered the image again a day later, after giving my eyes a break from staring at computer and phone screens, and lo and behold, the dress was blue and black. Just like that. I looked at it several more times over the course of an hour to be sure. Yes, it was still blue and black. The following morning, my brain switched over and saw the dress as white and gold. What the hell?

The bluish tint in the photo can be interpreted by some people as shadows, which the brain then compensates for by interpreting the blue of the dress as a bluish-tinged white and the black as gold. One way to correct this is to view the photo of the dress under artificial yellow-tinted lighting. What it all boils down to, though, is that it is all about perception, and that perception is always relative. Two people can look at the same thing and interpret it completely differently. Does it mean that one person is wrong and the other person is right?

One thing that is certain is that the manufacturer of the dress will make a fortune selling this particular design now that a global internet buzz has been created. I am willing to bet that a few people will actually wear Halloween costumes spoofing the color debate as well. Ah, if only I had stock in that company!

I enjoyed reading this description of color constancy which explains why most people see the dress as white and gold:

http://www.businessinsider.com/color-of-the-blue-and-black-dress-science-2015-2

The Dress

Our brains filter and compensate constantly to process an endless influx of sensory stimuli. Perhaps the world is more aware of that fact now that a dress has challenged our perceptions!

Emotional Eating

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Originally published on RxGirl.com on Monday, 12 November 2012. The original post was published with white text on white background, so the only way to read it on the site is to highlight the text. To make things easier for everyone, I have copied and pasted the article here for you to read.

http://www.rxmuscle.com/rx-girl-articles/6941-emotional-eating.html

emotional-eating ice creamRather than discuss well-known emotional eating disorders such as bulimia, I will concentrate on binge eating which many women engage in from time to time. It is important to recognize this behavior if it becomes a regular pattern, because frequent emotional eating warrants a diagnosis of binge eating disorder and requires treatment and intervention.

Binge eating is characterized by eating compulsively to cope with negative emotions and stressful situations. A binge eater is rarely hungry when she begins to eat and will continue to eat well after she is full. Such episodes can last for up to two hours or can occur off and on throughout the day. The binger feels guilty both during and after the episode, but will not attempt to counteract it by fasting, taking laxatives, vomiting, fasting or over-exercising. A strong lack of self-control as well as feelings of shame will accompany this behavior pattern. There is a strong association between binge eating and depression. Binge eating is also driven by social components such as social pressure to be thin, emotional and sexual abuse, parental criticism of a child’s weight, and the use of food as reward or punishment.

Food cravings are usually the strongest when you are in emotional crisis. You may reach for food for comfort or to serve as a distraction. Consider the following highly stressful events and think about whether you reached for comfort foods during such times:

· Financial problems
· Health problems
· Work issues
· Relationship issues
· Fatigue
· Family issues

Though some people will lose their appetites when stressed and will refrain from eating, many others will engage in impulsive eating in an effort to deal with negative emotions. This may be relatively harmless if such emotional eating occurs on a very rare occasion, but becomes a serious problem when it is used as the only coping mechanism for stressful situations or negative emotions. Just bear in mind that if you have a rare moment of weakness, it is important to recognize it as just that and to prevent yourself from spiraling into excessive feelings of guilt over the incident. If you engage in an episode of emotional eating, learn to forgive yourself and have a fresh start the following day.

Why We Engage in Emotional Eating

What occurs almost invariably when we eat emotionally is that we turn to cookies, cakes, candy, fried foods and breads rather than to healthy foods. There is a biochemical basis for such behavior. Carbohydrates which are high in sugar or fat release dopamine in our brains which in turn stimulates the brain’s pleasure center, creating a sense of euphoria. These foods are usually associated with pleasurable memories, such as cake which you may have looked forward to on your birthday, or macaroni and cheese as a treat after school when you were a child.

Food can also serve as a happy distraction from conflict or stressful events by stimulating the aforementioned pleasure centers. What will frequently occur is that an excessive amount of these foods will be consumed. However, if you remain aware of such automatic connections between food and mood and realize when you are eating for reasons other than hunger, you can break this cycle and get back on track with healthy eating habits which are associated with true hunger.

How To Combat Emotional Eating

· Keep a food diary. Get in the habit of writing down everything you eat and drink, including the quantity, the times at which you eat, your emotional state while eating the meal, and your level of hunger. By doing this you may see patterns which will reveal your emotional relationship with food.

· Remove tempting foods. Avoid stocking comfort foods in your home if you find that they are difficult to resist. And by all means avoid making trips to the grocery store if your emotions are spiraling out of control!

· Practice stress management. Yoga, meditation, and relaxation techniques are effective methods of managing your stress.

· Determine whether you are truly hungry. Many times people may believe they are hungry when in reality they are actually emotionally distraught and desperately searching for a way to defuse such emotions.

· Make sure you consume adequate calories. Individuals who are trying to lose weight will often restrict their calorie intake too much, and will turn to the same foods in an effort to remain on track without rewarding themselves with an occasional treat. Adding variety to your meal plan will also help to keep you on track.
Emotional_Eating cake
· Distract yourself. If you get an urge to snack when you aren’t truly hungry, distract yourself by watching a movie, calling a friend, reading, listening to music, or taking a walk.

· Consume healthy snacks. If an urge to snack between meals strikes, choose a low-calorie snack such as vegetables with seasoned nonfat Greek yogurt, fresh fruit, low fat cottage cheese or rice cakes.

· Get enough sleep. Getting enough sleep is an important component in decreasing cravings for comfort foods.

· Eat at regular intervals. Consume smaller meals every three to four hours to keep you from feeling hungry or deprived.

· Focus on the experience of eating. Learn to eat in a mindful manner, in which you pay attention to your meal and only your meal. Become aware of the sensations associated with eating.

· Reward yourself. It is both physically and emotionally unhealthy to practice excessive calorie restriction for prolonged periods. Allow yourself to have a favorite food or meal once each week.

· Connect with your emotions. When a food craving hits during an emotional time, write down the emotions you are experiencing, such as sadness, loneliness or anger.

· Seek professional help if emotional eating is frequent. There are countless support groups which you can join which will help you to develop insight as well as the skills to avoid engaging in such behavior.

Excusitis And How To Banish It

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http://www.rxmuscle.com/rx-girl-articles/5936-excusitis-and-how-to-banish-it.html

The original post was published on Tuesday, 26 June 2012 on RxGirl.com. It is difficult to read on the site, so I have copied and pasted the article here for you to read.

???????????????????????????????????????As a physician and fitness professional I constantly encounter people who suffer from something I like to call “excusitis”. It is not uncommon for a patient to lament over her excess weight, using the fact that she has had children as an excuse for refusing to take charge over her life. Another common scenario is the man who is just entering middle age and is despondent over his growing belly, yet has no intention of giving up his preference for daily treks to fast food establishments. The list goes on and on, but every rationalization I have heard has been based on skewed logic and entrenched in a basic refusal to take ownership in a person’s own responsibility for not being in shape.

I understand that making a decision to be healthy and fit can be very challenging because it requires a person to be held accountable for unhealthy patterns and behaviors. This is complicated by the fact that the American diet is so heavily reliant on processed foods that most people have trained their brains and bodies to hold onto fat and function at a suboptimal level. To be truly fit, a mental shift must occur which motivates oneself to obliterate the old patterns which have served as a blockade to attaining better health. Initially these lifestyle changes can be daunting since they are in opposition to how the person has become accustomed to living. However, if one persists in adopting healthy behaviors, cravings for unhealthy foods will dissipate and a transformation of mind will occur, with the body soon following along.
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Excuses are an easy way out and are reflective of the pervasive message which society sends out. What do I mean by this? If you think about all the fad diets, diet pills, and other weight loss gimmicks which are on the market, it is no surprise that many individuals are threatened by the idea of being proactive about their own health and fitness. Without sugar-coating it, lifelong fitness and wellness rely on a foundation which takes time to establish and which require commitment on the part of the individual.

I find that by sharing before and after photos and transformation stories of individuals who have lost a tremendous amount of weight or battled cancer only to stand later as a beacon of optimal health and fitness, I can often impact patients and clients in a very powerful way. The stories I share are of ordinary people who were often in horrific shape prior to deciding to take a proactive stance on their own health, many of whom are now fitness professionals who serve as incredible inspiration for others. Once I share transformation stories with a patient or client, I set specific goals and monitor their progress within a program. For those who cannot afford to see a physician, dietitian, trainer or coach, there are a multitude of resources available now, from online training and food logs to online support groups which will help a person to stay on track.
Do It
If you have been vacillating between taking charge of your life and wallowing in self-pity, it is time to stop making excuses and choose the former. You will be rewarded with better health, greater vitality, a more fit body and a boost in self-confidence. It’s a win-win situation.

My Bio on MensPhysique.com

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http://www.rxmuscle.com/contibutors/3032-stacey-naito-do-aobfp-mensphysiquecom-blogger.html

stacey pro card

Though Dr. Stacey Naito (D.O., AOBFP) is a physician and published medical researcher who is board-certified family medicine and is also highly experienced with all non-surgical aspects of aesthetic medicine, her biggest passion is fitness. She obtained her Bachelor’s Degree in Exercise Science from Occidental College and began working as a fitness trainer immediately after obtaining her degree. Weight training became an integral part of Dr. Naito’s daily routine, even during her post-doctoral residency training which at times had her working up to 120 hours per week. As a result of her determination to continue training during the most rigorous of schedules, she is committed to sending a strong message to people that anything is possible as long as it is made into a priority.

Dr. Naito started competed in the NPC in 2009 and earned her IFBB Pro card and immediately began competing in the pro league in 2013. While in the NPC, she quickly moved up the ranks at the NPC level and earned seven national first place finishes in the NPC. Stacey has also done very well on the IFBB stage. Through her experiences she has learned a great deal about every aspect of competing, and she makes every effort to pass this valuable information on to those who are new to the contest stage. When not working as a physician, training or attending or competing at an NPC/IFBB event, Dr. Naito spends her time working modeling gigs and writing articles.

Dr. Naito’s involvement in fitness, coupled with her medical expertise, has provided her with a powerful platform by which she can inspire patients and clients to reach their ultimate fitness and wellness goals through optimal exercise and nutrition.

Follow Dr. Naito on Facebook or visit her websites:

http://www.1hothapa.com

http://www.staceynaito.com

http://www.cutcurves.com

https://www.facebook.com/stacey.naito

Time Zones, Reasonable Hours And The People Who Ignore Them

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World TimeZones (analog)

I appreciate being able to meet people from other parts of the United States and the globe because they broaden my perspective and remind me that the world is much larger than what I am aware of as I navigate through a typical day in Southern California. As a result of my travels, I communicate relatively regularly with people who live in time zones that are 3 to 19 hours ahead of me. Whenever I attempt to communicate with them, I try to remain acutely aware of what time it is for them in their corner of the world. That is why I become very irritated when I get text messages and messages on Facebook Messenger in the middle of the night from people who are on the other side of the globe and think it’s a good time to initiate a chat with me. Some people are so clueless that when I respond to a message stating that I am trying to sleep, they KEEP MESSAGING me, causing my phone to clang repeatedly like a bell. I realize that I can (and DO) turn off my ringer, turn off my phone or ignore the messages, but there are two reasons why I respond to such communication attempts:

1. If I don’t respond immediately, I must deal with and endless stream of lengthy messages the next morning, scolding me for not responding.
2. I feel strongly compelled to inform the person that it’s late and that I must put an abrupt end to the conversation stream.

To be honest, I know that I test people when I tell them that it is late and that I am going back to sleep. The way to pass my test is to register a quick apology and allow me to rest, but some individuals seem to lack the sense to drop the conversation. One person who was an acquaintance I knew through Facebook contacted me last night past midnight and kept sending messages and images which woke me up repeatedly, so I told him to please stop. Instead of stopping, he explained to me that it was 12 noon where he was. Okay, that’s fine, but why did he keep messaging me, trying to engage me in a conversation I wanted no part of? I told him to please stop sending messages so that I could go back to sleep. His reaction was to KEEP MESSAGING ME. I have been in situations where I had miscalculated the time zone where a friend was, but as soon as I realized my mistake, I sent a quick apology and then stopped communicating with them. Unfortunately, this guy didn’t have the sense to realize how much of a pest he was, so my reward for his persistence was to block him.
doctorisout
I deal with people who think that because I am in the public eye and a physician, I must be on call 24/7. Not so, ESPECIALLY if someone pressures me to take care of their needs immediately when I have no professional responsibility toward them. The sense of entitlement some people have just blows me away! So-called “quick questions” become long, drawn-out consultation requests, and when I don’t have answers, some individuals cop an attitude after I have taken time out of my busy day to be cordial and helpful. It’s enough for me to consider telling everyone that they must submit questions to me during normal business hours, otherwise leave me alone. I must draw a line in the sand because I tend to sacrifice a great deal of my time and resources to help others, and run myself into the ground as a result.

How Emotional Eating Can Derail You From Your Fitness Goals

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emotional-eating ice cream - Copy

Rather than discuss well-known emotional eating disorders such as bulimia, I will concentrate on binge eating which many women engage in from time to time.  It is important to recognize this behavior if it becomes a regular pattern, because frequent emotional eating warrants a diagnosis of binge eating disorder and requires treatment and intervention.

Binge eating is characterized by eating compulsively to cope with negative emotions and stressful situations.  A binge eater is rarely hungry when she begins to eat and will continue to eat well after she is full.  Such episodes can last for up to two hours or can occur off and on throughout the day.  The binger feels guilty both during and after the episode, but will not attempt to counteract it by fasting, taking laxatives, vomiting, fasting or over-exercising.  A strong lack of self-control as well as feelings of shame will accompany this behavior pattern.  There is a strong association between binge eating and depression.  Binge eating is also driven by social components such as social pressure to be thin, emotional and sexual abuse, parental criticism of a child’s weight, and the use of food as reward or punishment.

Food cravings are usually the strongest when you are in emotional crisis.  You may reach for food for comfort or to serve as a distraction.  Consider the following highly stressful events and think about whether you reached for comfort foods during such times:

  • Financial problems
  • Health problems
  • Work issues
  • Relationship issues
  • Fatigue
  • Family issues

Though some people will lose their appetites when stressed and will refrain from eating, many others will engage in impulsive eating in an effort to deal with negative emotions.  This may be relatively harmless if such emotional eating occurs on a very rare occasion, but becomes a serious problem when it is used as the only coping mechanism for stressful situations or negative emotions.  Just bear in mind that if you have a rare moment of weakness, it is important to recognize it as just that and to prevent yourself from spiraling into excessive feelings of guilt over the incident.  If you engage in an episode of emotional eating, learn to forgive yourself and have a fresh start the following day.

 
Why We Engage in Emotional Eating

 

What occurs almost invariably when we eat emotionally is that we turn to cookies, cakes, candy, fried foods and breads rather than to healthy foods.  There is a biochemical basis for such behavior.  Carbohydrates which are high in sugar or fat release dopamine in our brains which in turn stimulates the brain’s pleasure center, creating a sense of euphoria.  These foods are usually associated with pleasurable memories, such as cake which you may have looked forward to on your birthday, or macaroni and cheese as a treat after school when you were a child.

 

Food can also serve as a happy distraction from conflict or stressful events by stimulating the aforementioned pleasure centers.  What will frequently occur is that an excessive amount of these foods will be consumed.  However, if you remain aware of such automatic connections between food and mood and realize when you are eating for reasons other than hunger, you can break this cycle and get back on track with healthy eating habits which are associated with true hunger.

 

How To Combat Emotional Eating

 

  • Keep a food diary.  Get in the habit of writing down everything you eat and drink, including the quantity, the times at which you eat, your emotional state while eating the meal, and your level of hunger.  By doing this you may see patterns which will reveal your emotional relationship with food.

 

  • Remove tempting foods.  Avoid stocking comfort foods in your home if you find that they are difficult to resist.  And by all means avoid making trips to the grocery store if your emotions are spiraling out of control!

 

  • Practice stress management.  Yoga, meditation, and relaxation techniques are effective methods of managing your stress.

 

  • Determine whether you are truly hungry.  Many times people may believe they are hungry when in reality they are actually emotionally distraught and desperately searching for a way to defuse such emotions.

 

  • Make sure you consume adequate calories.  Individuals who are trying to lose weight will often restrict their calorie intake too much, and will turn to the same foods in an effort to remain on track without rewarding themselves with an occasional treat.  Adding variety to your meal plan will also help to keep you on track.

 

  • Distract yourself.  If you get an urge to snack when you aren’t truly hungry, distract yourself by watching a movie, calling a friend, reading, listening to music, or taking a walk.

 

  • Consume healthy snacks.  If an urge to snack between meals strikes, choose a low-calorie snack such as vegetables with seasoned nonfat Greek yogurt, fresh fruit, low fat cottage cheese or rice cakes.

 

  • Get enough sleep.  Getting enough sleep is an important component in decreasing cravings for comfort foods.

 

  • Eat at regular intervals.  Consume smaller meals every three to four hours to keep you from feeling hungry or deprived.

 

  • Focus on the experience of eating.  Learn to eat in a mindful manner, in which you pay attention to your meal and only your meal.  Become aware of the sensations associated with eating.

 

  • Reward yourself.  It is both physically and emotionally unhealthy to practice excessive calorie restriction for prolonged periods.  Allow yourself to have a favorite food or meal once each week.

 

  • Connect with your emotions.  When a food craving hits during an emotional time, write down the emotions you are experiencing, such as sadness, loneliness or anger.

 

  • Seek professional help if emotional eating is frequent.  There are countless support groups which you can join which will help you to develop insight as well as the skills to avoid engaging in such behavior.

 

One last note: make sure to get vital nutrients into your diet on a daily basis. I recommend taking a multivitamin several times a day to optimize absorption, and my favorite is SWAT Fuel’s .40 Caliber. SWAT Fuel’s .40 Caliber Multivitamin delivers high bioavailability on a three time dosing regimen each day and is suitable for everyone, but it is especially great for individuals who tend to experience intestinal discomfort from multivitamin formulas.

You can order .40 Caliber directly from the website: http://swatfuel.com/products.aspx