Tag social life

Still A Hermit? Break Out Of Your Shell!

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The lockdown of 2020 still hasn’t worn off for some people who have continued the habit of staying home all the time. After developing patterns of behavior which caused us to focus on home-based activities, the idea of becoming more socially active can be daunting to say the least. Here are some ways people can ease into becoming more social, and venture out of their homes:

1. Start with Small Steps

  • Go for Short Walks: Start with simple outdoor activities like going for a walk in a nearby park or just around your neighborhood. Gradually increase the time you spend outdoors.
  • Errands or Short Trips: Instead of staying inside, you can plan a trip to the grocery store, library, or café. Doing errands can help get you out of the house while feeling like it’s part of a regular routine.

2. Set Achievable Social Goals

  • Meet with One Person: Instead of jumping into large social events, try meeting one friend or family member for coffee or a meal. Even if it’s a short interaction, it can help build your confidence in socializing again.
  • Join a Group Activity: Consider joining a small group or class, such as a book club, fitness class, or hobby-based meetup. Being part of a structured group gives you a reason to leave home and offers opportunities to interact in a low-pressure setting.

3. Create a Routine

  • Schedule Outings: Put specific events or activities on your calendar, like going to a museum or attending a community event. Having these planned in advance can make it easier to commit and can help you stick to a routine of leaving the house.
  • Set Time for Socializing: Block out time in your schedule for social activities, whether it’s a phone call with a friend or joining a social gathering. Having these moments planned helps combat the urge to isolate yourself.

4. Focus on Enjoyable Activities

  • Pursue Interests Outside: Think of activities that you genuinely enjoy that happen outside your home—maybe hiking, seeing a movie, or attending a concert. The more enjoyable the activity, the more likely you are to make it a habit.
  • Volunteer: Volunteering for causes you care about is a great way to break the hermit cycle. It’s a positive way to interact with others and can help you feel connected to your community.

5. Challenge Negative Thoughts

  • Address Social Anxiety: If fear of judgment or social anxiety is keeping you at home, consider working on these feelings. Sometimes, it helps to remind yourself that people are often more focused on their own lives than on scrutinizing others.
  • Shift Your Perspective: If you’re accustomed to staying home, you may have developed thoughts that reinforce this habit (e.g., “I’m more comfortable alone” or “There’s nothing for me outside”). Challenge these thoughts by reminding yourself of past positive experiences or new opportunities.

6. Use Technology as a Bridge

  • Start with Virtual Socializing: If leaving home feels overwhelming, begin by engaging in virtual social activities like online classes, group video chats, or forums. It can serve as a way to ease into in-person interactions.
  • Track Progress: Consider using a tracking app or journal to keep a record of your efforts to leave the house. Tracking your progress can help you celebrate small victories and motivate you to keep going.

7. Get an Accountability Buddy

  • Find a Supportive Friend: Find someone who understands your struggle and can encourage you to get out more. They might help by inviting you to do things or checking in on your progress, making the transition easier.
  • Join a Fitness Challenge: Participating in a fitness challenge or committing to a workout buddy can motivate you to leave the house regularly for exercise or outdoor activities.

8. Redesign Your Space

  • Create a Comfortable Environment Outside: Sometimes, creating a space outside of your home that feels inviting can help make the transition easier. If you enjoy reading, consider sitting at a park or café instead of at home. If you’re into photography, explore new outdoor spots for photo opportunities.

9. Address Underlying Causes

  • Reflect on Why You Stay Home: It’s important to look deeper into why you prefer being a hermit. Are there emotional or mental health factors that are keeping you isolated? Addressing things like loneliness, anxiety, or depression with the help of a therapist can be crucial in breaking this habit.
  • Practice Self-Compassion: Don’t be hard on yourself. Moving out of isolation takes time and it’s okay to take gradual steps. Celebrate any progress, even if it feels small.

10. Engage in Group or Public Activities

  • Attend Public Events: Participate in community events, such as fairs, farmers’ markets, or outdoor festivals. These events offer a casual atmosphere where you can interact with people without pressure.
  • Take a Class: Whether it’s a cooking class, pottery, or a dance lesson, learning something new in a group setting provides both a reason to leave your home and a chance to meet new people.

By combining these strategies, it’s possible to break the cycle of isolation while respecting your pace. Each step taken, no matter how small, can lead to a greater sense of connection, improved mental well-being, and a healthier balance between solitude and socializing.

How To Have A Social Life While Recovering From Addiction

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It was the partying and bars that helped bring you to this point. After years of self-destructive behavior, failed relationships, and even some run-ins with the law, you’ve finally managed to walk that straight edge. You’re clean and sober, and you have every reason to want to keep that going. 

But you also deserve friends, fun, and the rest that comes with having some kind of social life. That can be tough when you’re recovering from addiction. Society as a whole is not designed to be supportive to those in recovery. But without social interactions and good times, the resulting depression and loneliness can trigger a relapse. 
To help, Karen Weeks of Elderwellness.net shares some tips for staying clean and sober while going out and having fun.

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Finding The Right Activities

One of the keys to staying sober while going out for fun activities is picking the right ones. This takes some of your history into account. If you spent way too much time in your previous years in dive bars, heading to hear a band at one might not be the best idea. Here are some activities that help support you in your addiction recovery. 

  • Play some games: This doesn’t mean sitting alone on a couch playing video games. You need social activities. Instead, get some friends together for board games. Bring a pack of cards to a restaurant and play there. And yes, video games with a bunch of friends in the room does count. 
  • Go see some live sports: Sports loyalties bring out a passion from their fans. Even if you barely know people, you can quickly bond over a game. But instead of hitting the bar scene, go see the game live. Professional leagues can be expensive, but minor leagues can be even more fun. 
  • Join a local league or sports club: Speaking of sports, you can have a social life by joining a local league or amateur sports club. Many adults get together on weekends to play some football, basketball, and more. 
  • Check your local library and park district: You’d be surprised how many social activities are now being offered by your hometown’s library and park district. Visit their website and look to see what clubs, events, and happenings you can attend. 
  • Reconnect with former friends: If you lost touch with friends along the way, rekindling old friendships can be a healthy way to heal and move forward in your sobriety journey. If you have trouble finding old classmates, try a site like ClassFinders, which makes it easy to track down school friends by graduation date and alma mater.

Going Along With The Group

You can’t be that person who’s always telling the group where they need to go. Sometimes, you’ll have to head with your friends to some place that can challenge your sobriety. It’s not inevitable, but it is something you can handle. 

First, explain to your friends why certain activities are just not for you. There’s a difference between going to a restaurant that serves alcohol and a dive bar that serves nothing but cheap booze. Your friends will understand. 

Once out, a big way to stay sober is to change your focus. Instead of thinking about how you can’t enjoy a few drinks, focus instead on how you can mingle, talk to people, eat great food, that sort of thing. In other words, give your mind something positive to think about. 

Just make sure you have an exit plan. Hanging out at a club can be great, but what happens when you suddenly realize everyone around you is high? You need to know when to leave. But you also need to know how. 

A Sober Companion Can Save You

When you’re out and about, having a close friend who can leave with you can be a lifesaver. Suddenly leaving a club or house party is embarrassing, but it’s less so when someone is heading out with you. Find a friend that you can depend on like that, and be sure to make it up to them if you have to leave early. 

It’s not always easy living the sober life. You’ve already made many big changes to your lifestyle, and more are probably on their way. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a social life. Just pick your activities carefully, focus on something fun and sobering, and make sure you have an exit plan.