Today I transition from being a 50 year old to being a 50-something. It’s such a strange reality for me to move past the half-century mark, despite the fact that my joints ache more, my skin is losing its firmness, and rogue gray hairs threaten to disrupt the mass of dark brown hair on my head. My mind and spirit are stuck in an early 30’s zone, so I am constantly in a strange disconnect between how I feel mentally and where my body is chronologically.
Since my 50th birthday last July, I have received promotional mail from AARP and Forest Lawn Mortuary, which is extremely disconcerting. In valiant protest, I have increased my involvement in aerial arts, dabbled in other pursuits like fencing, and have maintained a 5 to 6 day weightlifting schedule each week.
To be honest, turning 50 caused me to fret a bit about my overall health, so I decided to obtain a full medical workup, including bloodwork, MRI’s of my injured left shoulder and neck, a mammogram and colonoscopy.
These were the results:
- Bloodwork results were completely normal, and as always, my HDL was over 70 and my LDL was under 100.
- MRI of my left shoulder revealed moderate bursitis, widespread inflammation, severe biceps tendinitis, and widespread tendinopathy. The good news is that my shoulder issues don’t warrant surgical intervention.
- MRI of my cervical spine revealed dessication of multiple intervertebral discs and osteophytes at multiple levels. Basically, my neck reveals that I am a dried up old bitch.
- Screening mammogram revealed a suspicious 5mm mass on my right breast, which was further evaluated with more views. It turned out to be a small cyst.
- The colonoscopy prep was definitely not enjoyable, but my days of water loading for contests made drinking the vile electolyte prep solution (bastards gave me the unflavored version…blech) a bit more tolerable. Aside from a small polyp, my colonoscopy was unremarkable.
Evidently, my body is doing a pretty good job of fending off aging. With a clean bill of health, I will continue to engage in my physical pursuits, eat clean food, meditate daily, and be thankful.
As I was speaking with one of my patients earlier today, I was struck by the fact that she said she had no time to do anything, and that her work schedule was so stacked that she felt like she was unraveling. I suggested that she take a moment at some point in her day to just sit still and BREATHE, without any task or agenda. Her reply? “Oh, I don’t even have time for that!”
It seemed unreasonable to me that this woman wouldn’t even take a few SECONDS for herself just to breathe, take momentary break from the maddening rush of her life, and just be in the moment. It’s not that people can’t stop and breathe, they WON’T, because they have been led to believe that remaining on the hamster wheel of life all the time is a necessary sacrifice for all the success they hope to achieve. The sad truth is that those brief moments of stillness enable the spirit to reset and restore balance to mind and body as well.
If you are like my patient, you are doing yourself a major disservice by constantly moving and not allowing yourself to rest, even for a few seconds. Even the most creative and driven people in the world find time to enjoy their surroundings, pause in the midst of chaos, and realign with themselves. All you will do if you insist on going full guns all the time, without a moment to rest, is burn out your adrenal glands, damage your immune system, and set the tone for depression and anxiety.
For only a few seconds a day, you can enjoy the gift of being in the moment. What’s even better is that you can indulge in such moments throughout the day, between projects, meetings and chores. You can even do it upon waking, right before you start the ignition in your car, while standing in line at the grocery store, or just about anywhere.
This is Ian Lauer and me in Malibu from a couple of years ago, shot by the amazing George Kontaxis. I think you can tell that Ian and I were very much a couple then, but we are now just very good friends. He remains one of the most important and special people in my life and I am blessed to know him.
Copyright Zoltan Vegh Photography
Shot in September by the amazing Zoltan Vegh. All rights reserved.