It seems that people are more prone to ghosting others than ever before, and it is incredibly frustrating to deal with people who do so. Such individuals reveal a glaring lack of empathy and a very low emotional intelligence quotient when they choose to ignore another human being over being direct and honest about how they feel. Some would argue that such behavior serves as an acceptable defense mechanism, but ghosting is just one of the ways in which narcissistic behavior emerges. Plainly stated, ghosting is a form of emotional abuse.
There may be times in which you might have been ghosted by someone, only to hear from that person again, without any explanation of why you were ghosted in the first place. If someone dares to do this, I would hope that any of you reading this article would do the sensible thing and block that person from your life. Undoubtedly, the person wants some type of emotional support from you and has decided to contact you again, but they lost the right to do so when they cut you off abruptly. Even if that person doesn’t contact you directly, but haunts you on social media, you are far better off blocking that person on social media and moving on, because that individual is toxic.
I was tricked by a lovebomber in March, and am still stunned by how quickly the so-called relationship advanced, how much of a textbook lovebomber the guy turned out to be, and how I felt like a complete fool at the end of the whole process. I am so enraged by what happened that I felt the need to warn other women about this type of man, and RUN IN THE OTHER DIRECTION.
Physically speaking, Ted wasn’t the type of man I would usually go for. He was very slender, had very long hair halfway down his back (not my thing at all), and was unusual looking. I dug the fact that he was half Japanese though, because as a half-Japanese woman, I have found that I relate so well to other half-Japanese people, and was even engaged to a half-Japanese man many years ago. As soon as Ted found out that I was half-Japanese, he highlighted that fact, and even told me that he had gotten a sign some years ago that the love of his life would be half-Japanese and would have a name that started with an S. I now believe that he made that up to pull me in emotionally.
I was also concerned about his checkered past, but as soon as we started chatting on the dating app that fateful Monday, I felt so much at ease with him that it honestly didn’t matter. Our first phone call the following night lasted 7 hours, then on Wednesday night we had another 7-hour phone conversation. We made plans to meet for dinner in my part of town on Thursday night, and he took care of selecting a restaurant, stating “you’re so busy and I want to make sure that I always help you out” which I mistakenly thought was a sweet gesture. As it turned out, someone hit his car when he was en route to my place and totaled his car, but since his car was still driveable, he continued to head to my place. He did ask me if we could take my car, to which I agreed without hesitation.
When Ted showed up at my door, I honestly felt like I was a participant in the show Love Is Blind, because though we had connected so beautifully on the phone, his appearance left a bit to be desired. He wore a surf pullover and jeans, not exactly appropriate for a night out on the town. He also had a disheveled appearance, but I shrugged it off. I drove us to the restaurant, a small sushi bar in my area, and we had such a fantastic time chatting and eating there that we agreed to continue the evening at my home by listening to music and talking. Our late night chat progressed into an overnight visit.
The next morning, we just kept talking until about 11 am, without a care in the world. Ted stated that despite the fact that he would have to call the insurance company about his car, and also arrange to have his other car fixed so that he could drive it, he didn’t want to leave. So I ordered lunch to be delivered, which he insisted on paying for. We continued talking for several hours, so I ordered dinner to be delivered, which he also paid for. Ted didn’t leave my place until about midnight that Friday. Ted told me on Friday that he already deleted the dating app, and I happily followed suit.
Since Ted was about to start an intense new job the following week, and also since he had car issues, that meant that we would have to rely on phone calls and texts, as well as me visiting him. He called me that Saturday, and we had a 6-hour phone call, during which he told me he loved me, and I swooned, returning the sentiment to him. What a whirlwind the whole experience was! I made arrangements to go to his place on Sunday, and told him I would cook for him, especially since he revealed to me that no woman had ever cooked for him. I lugged all the spices and other ingredients we needed for dinner to his place and cooked dinner, then stayed over that night. I made enough food to get him through his first week at the new job. The following morning, I took him to his new place of employment.
The second week with Ted was a bit rough, because he was forced to work a grueling schedule which included a 2:30 pm to 1:00 am shift that started on Wednesday. But by that time, I was so blinded by love that I was willing to do anything to help him out.
Skipping ahead to the second Saturday with Ted in my life, I was suddenly met with a cold shoulder. I was yet again supposed to go to his place to cook dinner as well as food for him for the following week, and we had agreed that it would be a good idea for me to come by around 11 am so that we could maximize our weekend time together. I was running behind, so I texted him to let him know. No response. I texted him around 12:15 pm to let him know I was on the road, and got a text from him saying that he had forgotten that he had a funeral to attend (he had mentioned this several days before, but we both forgot about it), that he had forgotten about it, but that I could still come over because he had given me a key to his place. I stated that I had stuff to do at home, and that I would prefer to wait until he got home after the funeral. Despite the fact that I was a bit miffed about the fact that he couldn’t text me or call me to let me know that he realized that he had to go to the funeral, I attributed it to him being sleep-deprived.
When I finally arrived at his place that Saturday evening, he was oddly distant, and when I asked if he was all right, he said that he was sad because of the funeral. However, he didn’t touch me, and when I touched him, he almost recoiled. Since I had so much food to prepare, I set about cooking everything while he blabbed about his day. The evening progressed nicely, but he was still a bit off. The next morning, as I was leaving, I asked him if he wanted to talk that night, to which he replied, “Oh yes, babe, absolutely”, and kissed me goodbye.
Ted then proceeded to ghost me. I didn’t hear a peep from him all day Sunday, and when I saw the next morning that he was active on Instagram, I became extremely irritated. I texted him, asking what was going on. His response was to dump me, stating that he wouldn’t be ready for a relationship for a while, and that he hoped that I would find what I was looking for in a relationship. Just like that, he was done with me.
Ladies, you have to be careful with these lovebombers! They will promise you the moon and stars, then pull the rug out from under you. I feel like such a fool, and now my radar is sharpened so that I never fall victim to that nonsense ever again.
What is a True Mirror? It’s a non-image-reversing mirror, nestled in a box frame, which enables you to see yourself as others see you. The issue with the True Mirror is that it can be quite jarring to finally see oneself as everyone else sees them. John Walter, the founder of the brand True Mirror, states in an email to Alix Tunell from RealSelf News:
“For many people, especially image-conscious people, the perception of asymmetry is overwhelming. It’s unfortunate, because it’s exaggerated—because things are on the opposite side [from what you’re used to seeing], they get doubled in your own perception.”
This was certainly the case for me the first time I looked into the True Mirror, and I was so rattled by my facial asymmetry that I refused to gaze into the contraption for several days. I understand now that my brain is still exaggerating subtle differences when I look into the True Mirror, and that I can gain comfort by looking into a standard reversing mirror. I also understand that the True Mirror is best appreciated when your face is animated, because you will then see the true reflection of your energy. It’s a complete trip and something I would recommend to anyone.
I absolutely love this Ted Talk by Caroline McHugh, so I am reposting it a second time. She is a brilliant woman who speaks so eloquently and honestly about the sense of self.
I’m willing to bet that most of you who are reading this blog post remember your first romantic kiss in decent detail, so I hope this inspires you to think about that special moment in your life. You might be wondering why I gave this blog post the title it is sporting, but after I share the story of my first romantic kiss, you’ll understand why. My first real smooch with a boy was indeed memorable!
During the summer when I turned 12, I would spend alternate weekends at my dad’s apartment, and I would often bring my close friend Dana with me. My dad had moved into a new apartment complex, so I had many opportunities to meet kids who were close to my age, but one boy caught my eye. His name was Mark, he had a crop of wavy sandy brown hair, piercing blue eyes, a charming smile, and he was 16 years old. Mark and I took a liking to each other immediately, and he got into the habit of coming over to my dad’s apartment with his acoustic guitar and serenading me, which obviously had me swooning.
One afternoon, Mark sauntered over to my dad’s place, eating a banana. When he saw me walking towards him, he stopped eating, smiled, and asked me if he could come inside and hang out with me. Since my dad was at his office and wouldn’t be home for a while, I knew we would at least have some privacy, so I said sure. Mark walked into the living room and sat down on the sofa, then patted the spot next to him, encouraging me to sit there. I sat down, then Mark gently moved me so that my head was in his lap, then he leaned down and kissed me. The taste of banana was a bit strange, but the kiss was as great as a first kiss could be, even though I didn’t exactly know what to do. I figured if I mimicked what Mark was doing with his lips and tongue, that I’d be just fine.
After that first kiss, we spent a lot of time kissing and hanging out together, and Mark would regularly serenade me while sitting out on the steps in front of Dad’s place. We might have continued to spend time together after summer ended, but Mark moved away in the fall, and I never saw him again. I guess I could consider Mark my first boyfriend, despite the fact that we only saw each other every other weekend, and only for one summer. Looking back, I find it startling that a 16-year-old boy found a 12-year-old girl so enticing, but I guess that speaks volumes about how two people can be attracted to each other and not give any thought to an age difference or other variables. I thought Mark was so attractive, and I am grateful that my first romantic kiss was with a boy who truly showed interest in me, even though that kiss was tinged with the taste of banana!
It’s startling to hear men criticize women for having cellulite, because anywhere from 80 to 98 percent of women have it. The presence of cellulite on a woman does not indicate that she has too much body fat, or that she is in some way unhealthy. Cellulite occurs when fat pushes up against the fibrous connective tissue which lies over it, causing a “cottage cheese” appearance. Cellulite can become more noticeable with weight gain, hormonal changes, and poor skin quality, but it is absolutely considered normal for those who have it.
I recently heard one of my male friends literally exclaim “Ewww!” when I mentioned that I had some cellulite on the backs of my legs, prompting me to write this article in defense of all who sport some cellulite on their bodies. Mind you, I hadn’t even revealed the area in question on my body, but the reaction from my friend was unsettling. This is the kind of attitude that makes me want to keep my body covered up at all times, just to ensure that the backs of my legs don’t somehow offend an opinionated man. Honestly, even supermodels have cellulite, so could we stop picking on women (and men) who have it?
We have all heard that excessive or regular alcohol consumption can have serious adverse effects on health and can contribute to a range of health problems. That being said, some studies have suggested limited health benefits associated with moderate alcohol consumption. It’s also interesting to note that there are many instances in which centenarians, including a 105-year-old patient I once treated, have touted their regular intake of alcohol has played a part in keeping them alive and healthy into their elder years.
Here are several arguments which support the idea that moderate alcohol consumption could contribute to longer lifespans:
Cardiovascular Benefits: Some research has suggested that moderate alcohol consumption may be associated with a reduced risk of heart disease. It is believed that alcohol can raise HDL (high-density lipoprotein) cholesterol levels, which can have a protective effect on the heart.
Antioxidant Properties: Red wine, in particular, is often touted for its potential health benefits due to the presence of antioxidants, such as resveratrol. These antioxidants may have anti-aging and disease-fighting properties.
Social and Psychological Benefits: Moderate alcohol consumption in social settings can promote relaxation, reduce stress, and improve overall well-being. These factors may indirectly contribute to a longer lifespan by promoting mental and emotional health.
Reduced Risk of Some Diseases: Some studies have suggested that moderate alcohol consumption is associated with a reduced risk of certain conditions, such as type 2 diabetes. However, this relationship is complex and not well understood.
Certain populations, especially those found in regions known as “Blue Zones,” where people tend to live longer, healthier lives, include moderate alcohol consumption as part of their cultural traditions. However, it’s important to note that the longevity of these populations cannot be solely attributed to alcohol consumption but is influenced by a combination of factors, including diet, lifestyle, genetics, and social interactions. It’s important to stress that these potential benefits are associated with moderate alcohol consumption, which is typically defined as one drink per day for women and up to two drinks per day for men. Excessive or heavy alcohol consumption can have detrimental effects on health and longevity, including an increased risk of liver disease, addiction, cancer, and other serious health problems.
Furthermore, the relationship between alcohol and health is still a subject of ongoing research, and individual responses to alcohol can vary widely. If you have specific health concerns or are considering alcohol consumption for potential health benefits, it’s advisable to consult with a healthcare professional who can provide personalized guidance based on your medical history and individual circumstances. In many cases, the potential risks of alcohol may outweigh the potential benefits, and non-alcoholic means of promoting heart health and overall well-being should be considered.
Here’s another informative article by Camille Johnson of bereaver.com to inspire you to get the new year off to a fresh start!
Embarking on the path toward peak self-improvement often starts with cultivating an excellent physical and emotional presence. The role of self-assurance, influenced by both appearance and state of mind, cannot be underestimated. From casual daily interactions to life-defining moments, a boost in confidence can be a game-changer. To assist you during this transformative endeavor, this guide presented below by StaceyNaito.com is designed to present a meticulously curated set of recommendations.
Forge Strong Social Ties
One’s emotional landscape is deeply enriched by the presence of fulfilling social interactions. Humans are wired for connection, and fostering these connections significantly elevates one’s emotional well-being. Studies indicate that people with strong social bonds are generally happier and may even live longer. Therefore, one should consider taking up social hobbies or participating in community events to form and maintain meaningful relationships.
Staying in Shape
Starting a fitness routine can be a transformative journey toward better health and well-being. It begins with setting realistic goals and creating a balanced workout plan that includes a variety of activities to keep you engaged and motivated. Consistency is key, as regular exercise builds endurance, strength, and confidence. Nutrition also plays a crucial role, as a healthy diet complements physical efforts. For more detailed guidance and inspiration, visiting websites like StaceyNaito.com can provide valuable resources and expert advice to help you on your fitness journey.
Elevate Hair Care and Wardrobe Choices
The relationship between well-maintained hair, stylish attire, and self-esteem is undeniable. Investing in high-quality hair care products is essential for maintaining a healthy and vibrant appearance, much like the importance of choosing the right clothing for your wardrobe. The clothes you select play a crucial role in shaping how you feel throughout your day. For instance, choosing comfortable yet fashionable items can greatly enhance your daily experience. Similarly, incorporating a hair care routine that includes products like nourishing oils and effective shampoos transforms basic grooming into a luxurious experience. To boost your daily life, consider adding thoughtful and impactful pieces to your wardrobe that bring a sense of renewed confidence.
Cultivate a Skincare Regimen
Healthy skin is the canvas for your everyday look. Establishing a skincare routine that complements your skin type can yield a radiant complexion, positively impacting your self-esteem. For example, those with oily skin may benefit from a clay mask once a week, while people with dry skin may find relief with a hydrating serum. The important thing is consistency—following a skincare routine religiously can help you achieve the look you’ve always wanted.
Pursue Goals with a New Degree
Setting and achieving goals is a powerful process that can lead to significant personal and professional growth. For instance, if advancing your education has always been a dream, you might consider going back to school. Choosing between online data science master’s programs can be a strategic step, especially if you’re interested in the field of data analytics. By enrolling in an online master’s degree in data analytics, you can deepen your understanding of data science, theory, and application, all from the convenience of your home. This goal not only enhances your skillset but also opens doors to new career opportunities and advancements.
Prioritize Sun Protection
It’s astonishing how often sun protection is overlooked, considering the irreversible damage that UV rays can inflict. Daily application of sunscreen should be as routine as brushing one’s teeth. Not only does this habit prevent premature aging, but it’s also a crucial step in warding off skin cancers. Moreover, consistent sun protection enhances your overall skin quality.
Opt for Nutritional Wisdom
Intricately tied to your physical appearance and general well-being is your diet. Avoiding processed foods and added sugars can have a remarkable effect on both your skin’s glow and your overall health. For instance, replacing soda with sparkling water or choosing whole grains over white bread can be game-changers. This shift toward mindful eating benefits not just your appearance, but also enhances your energy levels and mental clarity.
Uphold Dental Care Standards
A radiant smile compliments any look. It’s the centerpiece of your facial features and often the first thing people notice. Regular dental check-ups, along with at-home practices like brushing and flossing, play a key role in maintaining that confident smile. This ties back to the first point on emotional well-being; after all, a radiant smile is often an indicator of happiness and strong social connections.
The quest to attain the pinnacle of physical and emotional wellness is a multifaceted endeavor. It requires a balanced approach that incorporates various elements of lifestyle, grooming, and social interaction. The pursuit of the optimal self isn’t a sprint but rather a marathon, demanding consistent dedication and awareness. As you integrate these guidelines into your daily life, you’ll find yourself at the very summit of your beauty and wellness journey.
We now live in an age in which we are so reliant on our cell phones that when they are misplaced, lost or stolen, it can be paralyzing. I know this feeling all too well now because my phone was stolen earlier this year, and I was without a phone for three days. I found myself reaching for my cell phone completely out of habit for the first few hours, then I began to resign myself to the fact that I didn’t have a mini-computer. I was forced to figure out other ways to navigate through my day, and it made me realize how much our phones provide for us. There was a 50th birthday celebration I had to attend the day after my phone was stolen, and luckily I had added the location which had been texted to me onto my Google calendar, so I was able to enter the address on my car navigation and get to the party without any issue. Otherwise, I would have had a devil of a time trying to reach my friend to get the address of the birthday venue.
Social media and other apps were a bit trickier for me to adapt to without a phone, since some apps only function through the mobile version and not the desktop version. I was also unable to post on Instagram Stories during the period in which I had no phone. As a result of being sans mobile phone, I spent an oddly peaceful and quiet weekend, uninterrupted by text messages, notifications from apps, or phone calls.
When I received my replacement phone, I was able to recover about 70% of the images and videos which were on my previous phone, mainly because I had a habit of uploading content onto my Dropbox account for backup. It was a completely different situation with my contacts, of which there were over 3,000. I discovered that Google drive had NOT backed up any of my contacts, so I was forced to look through email servers to recover some of the information and enter all of it manually onto my new device. Sadly, I was only able to recover just under 300 contacts.
It still surprises me how someone like me who grew up in an era before answering machines could be so dependent on a cell phone, as if it was a lifeline. I’m so old school that we had only one phone, a beige rotary dial phone, and I accepted the fact that if I called someone and there was no answer, the only thing I could do was call back at a later time. With a single phone line, and no call waiting back then, a friend calling in while my mom was blabbing with one of her work buddies would hear an annoying BEEP BEEP BEEP to indicate that the line was busy. Life was far less complicated back then.
Now that I am back up and running with a new cell phone, I have already settled into the feeling of security which having my phone around confers. Everything from ordering food to be delivered, to checking emails, to making mobile banking deposits, has become reestablished as my day-to-day pattern. People can call and leave a voicemail message if I am on the other line. These little computers have certainly become a necessity in this era!
