Still A Hermit? Break Out Of Your Shell!

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The lockdown of 2020 still hasn’t worn off for some people who have continued the habit of staying home all the time. After developing patterns of behavior which caused us to focus on home-based activities, the idea of becoming more socially active can be daunting to say the least. Here are some ways people can ease into becoming more social, and venture out of their homes:

1. Start with Small Steps

  • Go for Short Walks: Start with simple outdoor activities like going for a walk in a nearby park or just around your neighborhood. Gradually increase the time you spend outdoors.
  • Errands or Short Trips: Instead of staying inside, you can plan a trip to the grocery store, library, or café. Doing errands can help get you out of the house while feeling like it’s part of a regular routine.

2. Set Achievable Social Goals

  • Meet with One Person: Instead of jumping into large social events, try meeting one friend or family member for coffee or a meal. Even if it’s a short interaction, it can help build your confidence in socializing again.
  • Join a Group Activity: Consider joining a small group or class, such as a book club, fitness class, or hobby-based meetup. Being part of a structured group gives you a reason to leave home and offers opportunities to interact in a low-pressure setting.

3. Create a Routine

  • Schedule Outings: Put specific events or activities on your calendar, like going to a museum or attending a community event. Having these planned in advance can make it easier to commit and can help you stick to a routine of leaving the house.
  • Set Time for Socializing: Block out time in your schedule for social activities, whether it’s a phone call with a friend or joining a social gathering. Having these moments planned helps combat the urge to isolate yourself.

4. Focus on Enjoyable Activities

  • Pursue Interests Outside: Think of activities that you genuinely enjoy that happen outside your home—maybe hiking, seeing a movie, or attending a concert. The more enjoyable the activity, the more likely you are to make it a habit.
  • Volunteer: Volunteering for causes you care about is a great way to break the hermit cycle. It’s a positive way to interact with others and can help you feel connected to your community.

5. Challenge Negative Thoughts

  • Address Social Anxiety: If fear of judgment or social anxiety is keeping you at home, consider working on these feelings. Sometimes, it helps to remind yourself that people are often more focused on their own lives than on scrutinizing others.
  • Shift Your Perspective: If you’re accustomed to staying home, you may have developed thoughts that reinforce this habit (e.g., “I’m more comfortable alone” or “There’s nothing for me outside”). Challenge these thoughts by reminding yourself of past positive experiences or new opportunities.

6. Use Technology as a Bridge

  • Start with Virtual Socializing: If leaving home feels overwhelming, begin by engaging in virtual social activities like online classes, group video chats, or forums. It can serve as a way to ease into in-person interactions.
  • Track Progress: Consider using a tracking app or journal to keep a record of your efforts to leave the house. Tracking your progress can help you celebrate small victories and motivate you to keep going.

7. Get an Accountability Buddy

  • Find a Supportive Friend: Find someone who understands your struggle and can encourage you to get out more. They might help by inviting you to do things or checking in on your progress, making the transition easier.
  • Join a Fitness Challenge: Participating in a fitness challenge or committing to a workout buddy can motivate you to leave the house regularly for exercise or outdoor activities.

8. Redesign Your Space

  • Create a Comfortable Environment Outside: Sometimes, creating a space outside of your home that feels inviting can help make the transition easier. If you enjoy reading, consider sitting at a park or café instead of at home. If you’re into photography, explore new outdoor spots for photo opportunities.

9. Address Underlying Causes

  • Reflect on Why You Stay Home: It’s important to look deeper into why you prefer being a hermit. Are there emotional or mental health factors that are keeping you isolated? Addressing things like loneliness, anxiety, or depression with the help of a therapist can be crucial in breaking this habit.
  • Practice Self-Compassion: Don’t be hard on yourself. Moving out of isolation takes time and it’s okay to take gradual steps. Celebrate any progress, even if it feels small.

10. Engage in Group or Public Activities

  • Attend Public Events: Participate in community events, such as fairs, farmers’ markets, or outdoor festivals. These events offer a casual atmosphere where you can interact with people without pressure.
  • Take a Class: Whether it’s a cooking class, pottery, or a dance lesson, learning something new in a group setting provides both a reason to leave your home and a chance to meet new people.

By combining these strategies, it’s possible to break the cycle of isolation while respecting your pace. Each step taken, no matter how small, can lead to a greater sense of connection, improved mental well-being, and a healthier balance between solitude and socializing.

Wicked Has Made Green Cool Again

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Thanks to the release of Wicked, the color green (evoked by light which has a dominant wavelength of roughly 495–570 nm) is very much in style, which is fantastic for someone like me who has always adored most tints of the color family. To top it off, emerald green in particular has been one of my favorite hues, especially if the item is somehow faceted or sparkly. I have enjoyed seeing a plethora of items for sale right now which feature the verdant shade, because this is a color which rarely gets center stage. Of course, when the second act of Wicked is released next November, there will be another surge of green things popping up, which is absolutely fine with me.

Suddenly, the green designer leather handbags, clothing items, makeup, and even luggage that I have longed to be able to find are popping up everywhere. In perfect keeping with Wicked, that also means that pink has made a strong comeback, almost on the heels of the Barbie Movie craze which popularized the bubble gum hue. Since I absolutely abhor the color pink, this is a downside I must endure, especially because the rosy shades that are popping up are rather pastel and girly, and certainly nowhere on my list of preferred tones. Yet Glinda is known to say, “Pink goes good with green!”, and I know that if my mother were still alive, she would agree with Glinda’s assessment of the two shades beside each other.

I’ll just stick with the green.

Top Strategies for Seniors to Lead a Healthier, Happier Lifestyle

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Here’s another great post, written by Camille Johnson of Bereaver.com

Embracing the later stages of life with vitality and enthusiasm is within reach for everyone. As we age, adopting healthy strategies can significantly enhance our quality of life, allowing us to savor each moment with vigor. From making informed decisions about nursing care to understanding the impact of stress on our sleep, these choices play a crucial role in maintaining our independence and well-being. By committing to a few habits and practices, you can cultivate a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle. 

Recognizing the Right Time for Memory Care Transition

Deciding when to transition into a skilled care community is a significant decision. It’s important to be attentive to signs such as noticeable behavioral changes, increased confusion, or a decline in physical health. These indicators might suggest it’s time to consider nursing care. By exploring options online, you can find detailed facility reports, pricing info, payment options, and reviews from other families, helping you make an informed choice. This ensures you receive care tailored to your needs.

Setting Realistic Fitness Goals for Sustained Motivation

Setting realistic fitness goals is key to staying motivated and tracking progress. By defining clear objectives, like exercising three times a week, you create a structured plan that’s easy to follow. This approach not only keeps you motivated but also allows you to celebrate small victories, reinforcing your commitment to a healthier lifestyle. Tailor your goals to your personal capabilities to avoid burnout and maintain a positive attitude towards your fitness journey.

Managing Stress for Better Sleep

Managing stress is vital for quality sleep, especially as you age. Major life changes, such as retirement can increase stress levels, disrupting sleep patterns. Research shows that a significant number of older adults experience chronic sleep issues due to stress. Adopting relaxation techniques like deep breathing and meditation can mitigate stress’s negative effects on sleep. These strategies improve sleep quality and enhance overall well-being, paving the way for a healthier lifestyle.

Practicing Mindfulness with Apps

Incorporating mindfulness into your routine can be transformative. Mindfulness apps offer structured meditations that you can use in your own time, making them ideal for seniors. These apps provide guided meditations and exercises, allowing you to choose the duration and focus that suits your needs. With features like progress tracking, these resources ensure mindfulness practices are accessible and engaging, enhancing emotional resilience and overall well-being.

Enhancing Safety at Home with Simple Modifications

To reduce the risk of falls, consider making strategic home modifications. Ensuring that all areas of your home are well-lit can also help prevent accidents, particularly in hallways and entryways. Installing grab bars in bathrooms and staircases provides essential support, while removing tripping hazards like loose rugs creates a safer environment. Adding non-slip mats in the shower and on other slippery surfaces further reduces fall risks. These changes not only improve safety but also support independence, allowing you to navigate your home with confidence.

Maximizing Financial Resources Through Discounts and Assistance

Exploring senior discounts and assistance programs can save you money, allowing you to better support your health. Various initiatives are designed to alleviate expenses like housing and healthcare. Programs that conduct energy audits and address heating and cooling inefficiencies can help manage costs. By leveraging these resources, you can stretch your finances further, ensuring a more healthy retirement.

Embracing these strategies can transform your later years into a period of growth and enjoyment. By focusing on health, safety, and financial stability, you create a foundation for a life filled with purpose and joy. These proactive steps not only enhance your daily experiences but also empower you to face the future with confidence and optimism.

Elevate your wellness journey with expert nutrition and fitness plans from Dr. Stacey Naito – your destination for transformative health solutions and premium gear!

Building Lasting Habits: How to Keep Up with Your Wellness Goals

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Check out this helpful article by Julia Merrill of befriendyourdoc.org!

Consistency is key when it comes to wellness and self-care, yet maintaining momentum can often feel challenging amid life’s demands. Staying committed to these goals requires more than just motivation; it calls for intentional habits, thoughtful planning, and realistic strategies that make wellness a sustainable part of daily life. By creating a framework that integrates self-care into your routine, you can build lasting habits that nurture your physical and mental well-being, even on busy days.

Crafting a Consistent Wellness Routine for Lasting Self-Care

Creating a daily routine that integrates wellness and self-care practices is crucial for maintaining both physical and mental health. By incorporating simple activities like drinking water upon waking, engaging in breathing exercises, or maintaining a gratitude journal, you can create a personalized schedule that supports your well-being. Consistency is key, as it helps reinforce these habits, making them a natural part of your day. Flexibility is also important, allowing you to adjust your routine as needed to accommodate life’s changes while still prioritizing self-care.

Improving Your Career Trajectory by Aiming for an Online Degree

Staying true to your career aspirations is vital, and one effective way to do this is by sharpening your skills through further education. Enrolling in an online degree program allows you to gain valuable knowledge in fields like IT, programming, and computer science theory, all while maintaining your current job. For instance, obtaining a computer science degree can significantly boost your technical acumen, preparing you for advanced roles in the industry. Also, thanks to the flexibility of online learning, here’s a solution that makes it feasible to balance work and study. 

Empowering Your Wellness Journey Through Informed Choices

Understanding the advantages of various wellness activities is crucial for making informed decisions that align with your personal health goals. By educating yourself on the benefits of different wellness practices, such as wearable technology, gut health, and holistic services, you can tailor your self-care routine to meet your specific needs. For instance, insights from the 2024 Health and Wellness Toolkit reveal that individuals who actively engage in wellness behaviors often experience enhanced physical, mental, and emotional well-being.

Employing the Power of Accountability for Wellness Success

To maintain consistency in your wellness and self-care objectives, consider joining accountability groups or partnering with a friend. This approach not only provides a structured framework for tracking progress but also enhances motivation through shared responsibility. When you know someone else is counting on you to meet your commitments, it becomes harder to justify skipping steps or making excuses. Regular check-ins serve as constant reminders of your goals, keeping them at the forefront of your mind.

Harnessing the Power of Social Connections for Stress Relief

Building a network of supportive friends, family, or support groups can significantly ease the burden of stress. Engaging with others who understand your experiences can provide emotional comfort and practical advice, which is crucial for managing both daily pressures and more severe stressors like burnout or PTSD. By sharing your challenges and triumphs with a trusted circle, you create a buffer against stress, which can lead to improved resilience and a more balanced life.

Incorporating Technology for Enhanced Fitness and Health

Incorporating fitness apps and wearable devices into your daily routine can significantly enhance your physical activity levels and overall health. These technologies provide real-time monitoring of vital statistics such as heart rate, steps, and sleep patterns, offering personalized insights and recommendations tailored to your health profile. By leveraging data-driven approaches, you can stay consistently engaged with your fitness goals, making it easier to track progress and adjust your routines as needed.

Mastering the Art of Saying ‘No’ for Better Self-Care

Learning to decline commitments that sap your energy and time is crucial for maintaining your wellness and self-care objectives. By saying ‘no’ to tasks that do not align with your overarching goals, you preserve your most valuable asset – time – for pursuits that truly matter. This practice not only safeguards your energy but also fosters healthier relationships, as it demonstrates self-respect and clear boundaries. While it might be challenging to refuse requests due to fear of judgment, remember that every ‘no’ to an unimportant task is a ‘yes’ to yourself.

Staying consistent with wellness and self-care is an investment that pays off in countless ways, from improved energy and mood to a deeper sense of personal fulfillment. By embracing realistic strategies and making small, sustainable changes, you can integrate wellness into your life as a natural extension of your daily routine. Remember that progress doesn’t require perfection; it’s the steady commitment to taking care of yourself that makes a lasting impact.

Discover a world of wellness, lifestyle tips, and more with Dr. Stacey Naito and elevate your everyday living!

Why Dating Is So Challenging These Days

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Dating today can feel particularly challenging due to a variety of factors, both social and technological. I can honestly say that I frequently consider abandoning the whole idea of meeting new people and going on dates, simply because making such efforts can be incredibly disappointing and frustrating. Here are some of the key reasons why dating in the modern era can be difficult:

1. Online Dating and the Paradox of Choice

With the advent of dating apps and websites, there is an overwhelming number of potential matches to choose from. While this may seem like an advantage, it can lead to what is known as the “paradox of choice” — too many options can make it harder to commit to one person. The ease of swiping left or right may also foster a mindset of “better options are just a click away,” which prevents deeper connection and commitment from developing.

2. Superficiality and Instant Gratification

Modern dating, especially through apps, tends to prioritize appearance, quick judgment, and instant gratification. Swiping based on looks can overshadow personality, values, and long-term compatibility. This shallow approach can make it difficult to form genuine, meaningful relationships that go beyond initial attraction.

3. Fear of Commitment

Many people today, especially younger generations, struggle with the concept of long-term commitment. There’s a societal shift toward prioritizing personal freedom, career advancement, and self-exploration over traditional relationship milestones like marriage and family. This can make dating feel like a series of short-term flings or “situationships,” rather than opportunities for serious partnerships.

4. High Expectations and Pressure

Social media and dating apps often present unrealistic standards of beauty, success, and happiness, which can put undue pressure on individuals to meet these expectations. As a result, some people may find it difficult to live up to the curated versions of themselves that they feel they must present to the world. Additionally, with all the “perfect couples” posted online, there is a heightened sense of competition and comparison, which can make people feel inadequate or unsure about their own dating lives.

5. Ghosting, Bread-crumbing, and Other Toxic Behaviors

The rise of digital communication has led to an increase in negative dating behaviors, such as ghosting (cutting off all communication without explanation), bread-crumbing (giving just enough attention to keep someone interested but without committing), and benching (keeping someone as a backup option). These behaviors are often easier to get away with in online dating, where anonymity and lack of accountability allow for more casual disregard of others’ feelings. Such experiences can make people wary of opening up to others, leading to distrust and cynicism.

6. Timing and Life Circumstances

The pace of life today can complicate dating. Many people are busy with careers, studies, or personal goals, leaving little time to invest in meaningful relationships. Additionally, as people reach different life stages, they may have different priorities. For example, one person may be focused on settling down and starting a family, while another might be more interested in casual dating or personal growth, leading to mismatched expectations.

7. Cultural Shifts and Changing Norms

Social and cultural shifts have altered traditional dating norms. Gender roles are evolving, and there’s more emphasis on finding equality and mutual respect in relationships. While this is largely positive, it can also lead to confusion around expectations, especially when people from different backgrounds or with different experiences come together. For example, the way men and women approach dating has changed, and these shifts may create misunderstandings or mixed signals about intentions, roles, and commitments.

8. Mental Health and Emotional Baggage

Many people today are more aware of mental health issues, but the increasing rates of anxiety, depression, and relationship trauma can make dating more difficult. The fear of vulnerability, past emotional wounds, or unresolved issues can make it hard to form healthy, trusting connections. Furthermore, the pressure to be “perfect” for a potential partner can exacerbate self-esteem issues, preventing people from fully opening up or engaging in the dating process.

9. Globalization and Long-Distance Relationships

Technology has made it easier to meet people from all over the world, but long-distance relationships can bring unique challenges. While digital communication can help maintain connections, physical distance, time zone differences, and limited in-person interaction can make it difficult to develop a deep bond. Additionally, some people might be hesitant to commit to someone they can’t easily see in person or feel pressure to keep up with the demands of maintaining a virtual relationship.

10. Changing Attitudes Toward Sex and Intimacy

In some ways, attitudes toward sex and intimacy have become more open and fluid, which can be liberating. However, this also complicates dating, as some individuals may have very different approaches or expectations about what sex, love, or commitment should look like. This can create friction in relationships, as mismatched desires or differing levels of emotional intimacy can lead to confusion or frustration.

11. Lack of Social Skills or Face-to-Face Interaction

As more people engage in online or app-based dating, the art of face-to-face communication and the ability to navigate the subtleties of in-person interactions have weakened. Social skills like reading body language, tone, or recognizing cues of interest or disinterest are less developed for those who rely heavily on texting or online chat. This can result in awkward, disjointed, or frustrating experiences when people finally meet in person.

12. Societal Pressure to Find “The One”

There’s a pervasive cultural narrative that tells people they need to find “the one,” or that their soulmate is out there waiting for them. This notion can make the dating process feel like an all-or-nothing endeavor, where any date that doesn’t lead to a deep connection is seen as a failure. It also places immense pressure on individuals to find someone who meets every one of their needs, making it harder to accept imperfections or to build relationships gradually.


In summary, modern dating is more complex than ever due to technological advancements, evolving cultural norms, and shifting expectations. While it offers new opportunities to connect with others, it also introduces new challenges. Navigating this landscape requires patience, clear communication, self-awareness, and an openness to building deeper connections in a world that often emphasizes speed, convenience, and surface-level interactions.

Candles Out Of Control

I had no idea that I would become fully obsessed with Voluspa candles, to the point where I have the majority of their 56 scents. Though I am not a fan of every single Voluspa candle fragrance, I own and enjoy over 40 of them. Voluspa candles are made with eco-friendly coconut wax, burn well, and most of the aromas have good throw, meaning that they permeate at least part of the room nicely.

In the span of three weeks, my Voluspa candle collection grew from 10 Voluspa candle varieties to over 40, thanks to the purchase of a candle warmer which increases the throw of smaller candles. I ended up purchasing many smaller candles in an attempt to accumulate the bulk of the Voluspa line. Obviously, my love for candles expanded into an earnest hobby which I enjoy immensely.

There are smaller candles in the wooden boxes on this shelf…

To give you an idea of which fragrances I have in my collection now, here’s the list:

I always make sure to have my candles displayed in such a way that they aren’t too conspicuous, and actually look like they are part of the decor. This is critical to me, because I abhor the idea of having clutter which isn’t organized in a clever way. The images on this post feature the main candle groupings I have scattered throughout the second floor of my home. As you can see, I have established candle mini zones so that I can display/store my collection in a manageable way. You can’t tell that I have over 40 Voluspa candles in my home! Incidentally, I also have several other candles from other candle companies as well.

Chronic Pain Sufferers Can Use This Holistic Guide For Active Living

Article written by Karen Weeks (https://elderwellness.net/)

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Living with chronic pain doesn’t mean putting life on hold. Innovative strategies and supportive resources are available that empower individuals to lead fulfilling lives despite persistent discomfort. By tapping into specialized care and community support, people with chronic pain can reclaim their daily activities and joy. In this article, presented by Dr. Stacey Naito, we’ll go over several things you can do to live an active life even with chronic pain.

PT for Movement and Pain Relief

Collaborating with a skilled physical therapist is pivotal in effectively managing chronic pain. These professionals develop tailored exercise regimens that address your specific pain points and mobility issues, whether they stem from joint pain, muscle stiffness, or injuries. Through gentle, targeted exercises, physical therapists work to strengthen your muscles, enhance flexibility, and improve overall mobility. 

Seek Out a Skilled Chiropractor 

Many things can contribute to chronic pain, but car accidents are one of the most common causes. Chiropractic care, especially from a car accident chiropractor, can significantly alleviate pain from back and neck injuries such as whiplash, herniated disks, and other accident-related conditions. These specialists focus on spine and joint alignment to help restore function and relieve tension. Treatment duration varies widely, from just a few sessions to ongoing care, based on the injury’s severity and your recovery progress. 

Pace Yourself 

Mastering the art of pacing is essential for managing chronic pain effectively. It involves balancing activity to avoid overexertion, which can exacerbate pain, and underactivity, which can lead to muscle weakening. By breaking tasks into smaller segments and taking regular breaks, you can conserve energy and avoid pain triggers. Prioritizing essential activities and learning to delegate or refuse less critical tasks also helps manage physical strain and mental stress, supporting a more comfortable and fulfilling lifestyle.

Access Pain Management Workshops 

Attending pain management workshops offered by clinics, hospitals, and organizations can provide comprehensive support and education on managing chronic pain. These workshops cover a variety of pain management strategies, from dietary tips to reduce inflammation to exercise routines and cognitive-behavioral techniques for mental coping. You can also look for telehealth services that will help you manage pain from the comfort of your own home.

Build a Supportive Community

Building connections with others who understand the challenges of living with chronic pain can significantly reduce feelings of isolation. Support groups, whether online or in person, offer a platform to share experiences, tips, and personal milestones, providing both emotional and practical support. These communities can help diminish loneliness and foster a positive, motivated mindset. Engaging with others facing similar struggles can also offer fresh perspectives and encouragement, making the pain management journey less daunting.

Track and Understand Your Pain

Regularly tracking your pain can play a crucial role in managing it effectively. Various apps are available to help monitor pain levels, triggers, and the effectiveness of different treatments, providing valuable data for you and your healthcare provider. This ongoing record helps identify patterns and tailor treatments more accurately, enhancing your ability to make informed decisions about your daily activities. Effective pain tracking also improves communication with your healthcare team, ensuring you receive optimal care tailored to your needs.

Alternative Therapies for Relief

Exploring alternative therapies can complement traditional treatments and offer additional relief from chronic pain. Techniques like acupuncture, which uses fine needles to stimulate specific body points, and massage therapy, which relaxes tight muscles and improves circulation, tap into the body’s natural healing mechanisms. These methods not only help in reducing tension and promoting pain relief but also enhance overall well-being and mobility.

Managing chronic pain effectively requires more than just enduring discomfort—it involves actively seeking solutions and support systems that enhance quality of life. With the right approaches and resources, individuals can navigate their challenges more confidently and with greater ease. This journey is about continuous learning and adaptation, enabling people to not only manage but thrive despite chronic pain. 

Candle Obsessed

My good friends are all well aware of how much I adore scented candles, because there is an assortment of them throughout my home. I am definitely not talking about candles from TJ Maxx or Marshall’s, or Yankee Candles, which are made with paraffin wax and soy wax and look and smell tacky. Thanks to my cousin Rose, who gifted me with two Voluspa candles on Christmas Eve 2020, I got swept up into the world of candles. Rose also inspired me to develop a nightly ritual in which I select a fragrance which resonates with me at that moment, light the candle, and enjoy the soft glow and wonderful aroma while winding down for the late afternoon into evening.

I have sampled other candle brands, but I keep coming back to Voluspa, which features eco-friendly and clean burning coconut wax. In addition, the vessels which Voluspa uses are absolutely gorgeous, so much so that it seems a shame not to repurpose every single one once the candle wax has completely melted. Lastly, the fragrances are outstanding, and they continue to add incredible new scents to their collection. At this point, I have ten favorites in their lineup, and two of them are relatively new:

Mind you, this is not a sponsored post in any way, shape or form. I simply love Voluspa candles, reed diffusers, diffuser oils, and room sprays, and intend to continue to feature their products in my home. What I love about Voluspa fragrances is that they are distinctive, unique, complex, and beautiful, similar to fine body fragrances. These aren’t cheap, flat scents, but layered, elegant, and deep olfactory journeys.

Why Burmese Cats Are The Best (Updated Repost)

Taiko, a Platinum American Burmese Male – My first Burmese love…

Since 1986, I have had fourteen different cats, and cannot imagine life without felines in my household. Six of the cats I had have been of mixed breed, while the other eight were purebred. Of those pure breeds, I have had a Blue Point Birman (Natasha, b1991-d2000), a Snow Bengal (Abbey, b2002-2005 not due to death), a Scottish Fold (Sophie, b2000-d2009), two European Burmese (Kazu, b2009-d2023, and Sumi, born in 2023), and three American Burmese (Taiko b2001-d2009, Tenshi, born in 2008, Koji, born in 2021). From the moment I brought Taiko, a platinum male, home, I actually enjoyed how intensely social and needy Taiko was, and I completely fell in love with his doglike personality, which I quickly learned was characteristic of Burmese cats. It was enough to solidify my preference for Burmese cats, and now I insist on always having Burmese cats in my life.

Tenshi, my Blue American Burmese Male

Burmese cats truly are extremely friendly, need to be around their humans the majority of the time, and are so drawn to laps that they are referred to as “lap Velcro”. Having lived with Burmese since 2001, I can definitely vouch for the fact that these felines are attention whores, which is quite the opposite of what some cat haters think about cat temperament. My cats are social, playful, gentle, and intelligent, and they often want to cuddle, sometimes when I am trying to do housework or telemedicine! I’m also accustomed to having all my cats on my bed at some point during every night. These cats have tons of personality!

Kazu, my Cream European Burmese Female (4.2.2009 – 5.12.2023)

There are some minor physical differences between American Burms and European Burms, such as head shape (American Burms have more rounded skulls, while European Burms have a slight wedge shape), and there are colors which are unique to E Burms (such as Cream, which is what my Kazu was), but both Burmese versions are very similar and also feature the same loveable personality profile. It is much more difficult to find European Burmese breeders in the United States, so if you have your heart set on an E Burm, you will probably have to travel out of state to find one.

Koji, my Sable American Burmese Male

As a matter of fact, I flew to Philadelphia in June of 2023 to scoop up a beautiful cream European Burmese female, whom I named Sumi. Sumi very quickly adopted the dual roles of official greeter and main bed buddy, both of which my dear, departed Kazu performed like a champ. It was absolutely worth it for me to fly across the country to get another blondie, because Sumi truly has become a snuggly sweetheart and a welcome addition to the family.

Sumi, my Cream European Burmese Female

The following are breed descriptions from CFA.org and TICA.org respectively. The CFA recognizes the American Burmese, while TICA recognizes the European Burmese.

AMERICAN BURMESE BREED DESCRIPTON:

The Burmese breed first came to America in 1930 when Dr. Joseph Thompson of San Francisco brought a small walnut brown female cat from Burma. He named her Wong Mau and bred her to Siamese cats. Through selective breeding the unique solid brown colored coat, now known as Sable, was isolated. This work demonstrated that these Burmese cats were a distinct breed and ultimately led the breeders to request championship recognition from the Cat Fanciers’ Association (CFA). Along the way, the other colors seen in the Siamese breed were also seen in litters. Over time and with much controversy, these other colors were accepted by CFA. The four colors we now recognize in CFA are Sable, a rich dark brown; Champagne, a warm beige; Platinum, a pale gray with fawn undertones; and Blue, a medium gray with fawn undertones.

Burmese cats carry surprising weight for their size. Their coats are short and close-lying, and they have a very silky texture. They need very little grooming, usually requiring only some daily petting. You will see a range of styles of Burmese cats, with those with rounder heads and shorter bodies being the show cats. Their large, expressive eyes radiate an innocence that will seduce you, and they have an irresistible appeal that has won over many a person who thought he didn’t like cats. Burmese cats have an endearing quality that has won the hearts of those lucky enough to be owned by one. They have great affection for their people, wanting to be with them as much as possible without being overly demanding. Many Burmese will even play fetch with a toy, given the chance.

Burmese kittens can be quite spirited. They are playful and fearless, attempting feats beyond their means and landing on their sturdy little rear ends. A Burmese kitten will remain playful well into adulthood. As they mature, their unique intelligence will reveal itself as their personalities unfold. They will soon grow into confident and charming little executives who will rule the house and your heart. Burmese are soft-spoken beings who have little trouble making their wishes known. They adore their people and are known for being good with children as well as liking (or at least tolerating) the family dog. Burmese are extremely people-oriented companions. Their personalities are almost dog-like. They will follow you from room to room, and they greatly desire to give and receive affection. They seek out warm laps and gentle strokes of your hand, and they love to snuggle up with their owners when they are reading or watching TV. Come bedtime they look forward to sleeping in or on your bed if allowed. Burmese are convinced that it is their job to run the house. Females tend to demand center stage and take an active role in managing the household. Males on the other hand tend to be more relaxed, managing from a comfortable spot on your lap. Be forewarned – Burmese cats can be addictive! It is not uncommon for someone to acquire a Burmese and find one is not enough. Many people ultimately have two or more Burmese, one of each gender or of different colors. Being one of the most trusting cat breeds, Burmese should never be allowed outside.  https://cfa.org/burmese/

EUROPEAN BURMESE BREED DESCRIPTION:

Burmese can be found in a range of solid and tortoiseshell colors: rich, dark sable brown; medium, warm blue; warm, honey beige chocolate with pink or fawn tints; lilac that ranges in tone from a bright pinkish grey to a silvery platinum with pink tints; reds of a light, golden apricot with melon-orange overtones; rich, warm deep creams with hints of apricot; and the soft mingling of red or cream with sable, chocolate, blue or lilac found in the tortoiseshells. In young cats, the points will be darker but as the cat gets older and the coat matures the body color becomes deeper and richer until there is only a very slight difference between its body and the color on the legs, head and tail. On Mar 29 1955, the first blue Burmese kitten, Sealcoat Blue Surprise, was born in England. Cats other than sable had appeared earlier, but most Burmese breeders chose to breed only the sable cats. It is now believed that Wong Mau also carried the genes for dilution and chocolate that resulted in the appearance of chocolate, blue and lilac kittens. The red factor was added later in Europe. The Burmese was one of the original breeds TICA recognized in June 1979.

Waterbeds

Who remembers waterbeds from the 1970’s and 1980’s? They had such an iconic “cool” factor that anyone who had one was considered pretty hip. My dad would frequently visit a friend of his in Huntington Beach, and the friend’s very cute older son, who was about 5 years my senior, would often invite my siblings and me to sit on his waterbed. Since I had a major crush on the boy, I would make sure I had applied my favorite lip gloss before entering his room and battling the undulating movement of the waterbed as I crawled onto it. The boy never noticed my efforts to pretty myself up, but I never gave up hope.

I never enjoyed how much movement occurred throughout the bed whenever anyone would move on it, because it was akin to sitting in a boat on a choppy ocean. It puzzled me how popular waterbeds were, because they didn’t seem stable or comfortable at all. I also didn’t like the large frame which encased the mattress, because it was always made of a hard wood with no padding whatsoever.

In 1981, when I was 14 years old, I met Tom, who became my first boyfriend. He was 15 years old and hung out with the stoner crowd at a large public high school. We met at a friend’s party and latched onto each other almost immediately, becoming an inseparable pair for almost a year. When I first visited him at his house, I noticed that he had a waterbed, and I soon found out that it was his pride and joy. He had a bedspread on it which screamed late 1970’s, with its wide brown, white, and blue stripes in a curved pattern.

We would have make out sessions on that waterbed, despite my complaints about getting motion sickness from time to time. I even lost my virginity on that waterbed to Tom, after 8 months of constant begging on his part for me to give in. Another incident which occurred on that bed was that I became violently ill one evening when I was at Tom’s place, and I threw up in a number of rooms in the house. Tom put me in the bed, placed a towel underneath my face in case I puked again, and called my mom to tell her that I was very ill and needed to stay at his place. I remember hugging the bed frame so tightly, in an effort to keep the waterbed from moving.

All in all, I am glad that waterbeds fell sharply in popularity after the early 80’s!