I’m A Jasmin Influencer!

I am so thrilled to be a Jasmin Influencer!  I have been with them since early December, and I have a blast creating highlights for the site and posting every day.  Yes that’s right, every single day, even on holidays and weekends!

Please follow me at www.Jasmin.com/staceynaito  and check out my highlights and daily story elements!  You can also direct message me anytime through the site, and I also make myself available for Video Calls for a pocket of time every day.

Topics I cover include:

Dating

Relationship

Soul Mate

Fitness

Flirt Advice

Beauty

Lifestyle

Travel

Fashion

I haven’t posted anything on Dance, but who knows?  I may talk about my three year stint with salsa dancing on the Jasmin platform!

You can sign up for FREE and get 15 FREE CREDITS!

 

I am also always open to suggestions on topics which you would like to have me cover.  Want more nutrition tips?  Beauty hacks?  Travel deals? Relaxation techniques?  On the go workouts?  You tell me, I’m open!

The Bush Is Back In Style, Ladies…

source: 123rf.com
Image ID : 99058606
Copyright : Vladimir Gjorgiev

If you’ve spent many years battling the crop of hair which continues to grow in your nether regions, I have some good news for you. The bush is officially back in style, so much so that celebrities like Gwyneth Paltrow are rocking their pubes like it’s 1971. Now you can be free of stubble, razor nicks, the pain of having a wax infused muslin strip ripped away from your groin, and the piercing pain of laser pulses deranging your hair follicles.

Of course, if you have had any treatments to impede hair growth (laser, IPL, or waxing), it may be challenging to get the lawn to grow in fully. A hair transplant clinic in London has actually answered that lament by offering pubic hair restoration for women who have had it removed by laser. Apparently this service is increasing in popularity too.

This also may be good news for men who prefer a lush, full pubic bush framing the garden in which they enjoy frolicking. I wonder if this somehow follows on the heels of the lumber-sexual beard trend which some men chose to adopt in recent years? In true hippie, or as the trendy term goes, bohemian, style, I guess we are all reverting to a freer time. It’s time to back away from laser hair treatments, waxing, plucking, and shaving, in favor of a return to what Mother Nature intended us to sport under our skivvies.

Moreover, there are numerous benefits to allowing pubic hair to return to its original, uncropped and untortured state, which are listed in this article:

https://www.bolde.com/full-bush-trendy-relieved/

source: 123rf.com
Image ID : 116442280s
Copyright : Olena Kachmar

Have patience while you let your magic carpet grow in. And once your muff mop returns to its unrestricted state, you can even improve it with products like Fur Oil, which is specially designed to condition its thicker texture. A UK-based company named Two L(i)ps sells a charcoal infused vulva mask which apparently “detoxifies” your vajajay, and works just as well if your kitty is as bald as a baby bird or if it rocks a shaggy mane. I simply must share some of the musings of Imogen Edwards-Jones who wrote a hilarious article for Get The Gloss in which she reviews this bizarre product:

“…I am not a woman who gives her wazoo much thought. I do rudimentary minge management. I wax and clip and occasionally when I’ve been a little too busy, I’ve posted the straggling escapees back under my bikini while relaxing by the pool. But basically my vagina and I, we get by.”

Here are her initial impressions of the mask:
“…Initially, it made me desperate for the loo. It was like wearing a cold, wet, swimming costume, unpleasant enough to trigger a virulent episode of cystitis. Then after about five minutes, it warmed up. Somehow that was worse. Perhaps I had peed myself unawares?”

The company recommends that you apply a mask every day for 5 consecutive days, which comes to a whopping $120. Now, I honor and appreciate my goodie parts, but I certainly am not about to fork out over 100 clams (pun intended) to see how this product might yield a brighter, toxin free cootch.

Whichever you direction you ladies decide to go in, shaved clean, cropped, or a mop, rock it the way you know best!

Vajazzling

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Image ID : 113005851
Copyright : Irina Timokhina

When I was researching the topics which comprised my two previous blog posts, I ran across vajazzling, a ridiculous trend which somehow caught on with women about ten years ago. Wikipedia defines vajazzling as:

“A vajazzle (also spelled vagazzle) is a form of genital decoration, formed by the application of crystal ornaments on the shaved mons pubis of a woman. The process is known as vajazzling, a portmanteau of “vagina” and “bedazzle”.”

Source: 123rf.com
Image ID : 82512498
Copyright : Marina Foteeva

I suppose vajazzling is better than genital tattoos or genital piercing, since it is painless and temporary, but I honestly don’t understand the appeal of affixing crystals onto your hoo-ha. Vajazzling art lasts anywhere between several days to 3 weeks, but you have to be careful about wearing tight clothing, because the fabric will cause all the baubles to rub off. You can expect to pay anywhere between $24 to $300 for an aesthetician to create a small masterpiece on your mound of Venus.

Here are a couple of videos which discuss vajazzling:

The adhesive which is used is medical grade, so the gems tend to stay in place quite well, even while swimming. But vajazzlers want women to be aware that frequent bathing may cause the stones to loosen more rapidly. My guess is that if regular bathing is discouraged to an extent, those private areas would need the extra ornamentation in order to lure their partners!

Technicolor Hair

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Image ID : 95962170
Copyright : Yulia Koltyrina

The idea of sporting brightly and unnaturally colored hair has taken off in recent years, and has asserted itself as a means of self-expression and individuality for many people. What’s wild is that this trend has caught on with middle-aged people as well as the younger crowd. Even the names of the hair color trends suggest whimsy, such as unicorn hair and mermaid hair.

Mermaid hair is specifically defined as a mixture of marine shades blended into bleached and toned hair, while unicorn hair colors are more reminiscent of cotton candy and “girly” pastel shades. However, this by no means is any indication that this is only for girls or women. The wildly colored hair movement is found among people of different genders and ages. I’ve seen men with lilac and aqua hair, and women in their 70’s with pink hair.

Check out this collection of mermaid hair color combos from Redken:

https://www.redken.com/blog/haircolor/13-mermaid-haircolors-that-you-have-to-see-to-believe

Then we have the fantasy colors of unicorn hair which are truly imaginative and distinct:

Unicorn Hair Color

If you’ve considered trying some fun hair colors, make sure you understand what you are getting into. If you have very dark hair like I do, the color change you will see will be very subtle, only detectable in sunlight and other types of light which illuminate the coating of color which sits on top of the hair cuticle. If you really want to go for a dramatic change, you must bleach your hair to prep it for color.

But is it worth it to bleach your hair in preparation for bubble gum colors? This fantastic article, written by Nicola Dall’Asen (IG: @nicoladallasen) goes into real depth about everything that is involved with maintaining a multicolored mane, and it isn’t all rosy. It’s a good idea to do some research on different products to see which works best for you, and definitely consult with a reputable color specialist who can bleach and prep your hair with minimal hair damage.

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image ID : 117877877
Copyright : lightfieldstudios

While Nicola focuses more on full coverage dyes, I have zero intention of ruining my naturally dark brown locks, so the only fun color products I have applied to my hair have been color conditioners. Overtone makes some amazing products, including color conditioners which are formulated to show up more on brown hair. I love the fact that application is so easy, and I also love the fact that there is no long-term commitment. If I wanted to allow the red tint which I applied to about 18 inches of my hair to fade, I would just allow my regular shampooing regimen to take place without using color conditioner, and the product would fade away after a few shampoos. I could start from scratch and maybe try purple if I wanted. Options are definitely much more limited for dark brown hair, so keep that in mind.

What I DON’T like about color conditioners (which also applies to permanent hair color) is that they make such a mess. Whenever I take a shower and wash my hair, my tub looks like a Jackson Pollock painting, and I have to remove the stains with bleach cleanser and a sponge every single time. I now have to spread a dark towel over my pillows and sheets when I sleep because the red will transfer to the fabric. I have also worn white or lightly colored clothing and then noticed later on that the neckline and back of my clothing were pink!

That being said, it has been fun experimenting with colors and knowing that I haven’t damaged my hair. In fact, Overtone Color Conditioners actually condition the hair and improve its luster. So I am definitely on board with using the products and having fun with them.

Give the temporary colors a try and see if you like them before diving into permanent color options.

Bohemian Vibes

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Image ID : 89336004
Copyright : Elina Zolotareva

I love the fact that bohemian, or boho, culture has blossomed as much as it has over the past few years. Bohemian fashion is creative, ethnically diverse and eclectic, not to mention loose and comfortable, and the social undercurrent of people who subscribe to bohemian culture is similarly diverse. Boho chic has brought back the hippie culture which had emerged during the early to mid-1960’s. The influence of hippies became so ingrained in our culture by the mid-1970’s that longer hair and colorful clothing from other countries was accepted as a new norm. Then with the Reagan era, a new conservatism swept the globe which remained for many years. Only in the past several years has the boho trend asserted itself once again.

Source: 123rf.com
Image ID : 60367478
Copyright : slena

Bohemian culture strives to break conventional norms, and to express a unique style. It appeals to artists, musicians, and anyone who is passionate about having essential freedom. Bohemians also strive to establish harmony with the environment, and often will participate in movements which are designed to save the planet. Think of events like Burning ManBurning ManBurning Man and Coachella, both of which capture the hippie free spirit vibe perfectly. Fashion-wise, the bohemian vibe allows people to mix and match different styles and colors on a whim to create a look which is truly unique.

So how do you put together a bohemian look? Just remember that a key feature of bohemian style is to mix textures, add accessories like jewelry, hats, or scarves, and to look and feel comfortable in whatever you choose to wear. Think of cozy fabrics like cotton, wool, denim, leather, and suede. Crochet and knit items, as well as some lace items, add a romantic flair and soften a look even further. Just make sure you don’t go overboard, or else you may end up looking like a thrift-store maven.

Boho chic tattoo design. Golden crescent moon and sun with elements of the mandala – astrology, alchemy and magic symbol.
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Image ID : 109387236
Copyright : Yulia SELINA

Will You Ever See Your Abs? REPOST

real fat man

One of the most common questions I get from people is how to lose belly fat and get defined abs. Since a tight midsection is one of the most enviable and desirable body attributes, I am never surprised by these inquiries. I have noticed that there is a relatively common misconception that defined abs come solely from exercise, which is definitely not the case. While a certain amount of development in the abdominal muscles must be present for the washboard appearance which many people covet, an individual’s food choices often interfere with the quest for six-pack abs.

If you really want to see abdominal definition, you need to eliminate the following foods from your diet:

SUGAR
Processed foods (including crackers, luncheon meats, cheese, chips, breads)
Foods high in saturated fat (red meat, fast foods)
Salad dressing
Alcohol

Though it may be difficult at first to eliminate the foods listed, you will notice over time that your palate will adjust and that food cravings will subside. That’s because processed foods and sugar set up a vicious cycle in which you crave more bad foods when you consume them. Cut them out of your meal plan, and your cravings will subside. Another benefit of avoiding these foods is that you will avoid the rapid spikes in blood sugar and insulin which they trigger. Why is this important? Because sharp spikes in insulin release promote increased fat deposition in the midsection.

Another dramatic change which you need to make is to drink plenty of water daily. My general rule is to buy an attractive 1 liter bottle, fill it 3 times during the course of a day, and drink all the water you put in that container.

If your abdominal muscles haven’t seen a sit-up in years, you should also incorporate abdominal exercises into your regimen. Here are my three favorite abdominal exercises which work for everyone, from beginners to advanced athletes:

bicycle crunches
Katie-Bicycle-Crunches
ball crunches
basic-crunches-on-stability-ball
planks
Plank-1024x538

If you are consistent with making healthy food choices and getting regular exercise, chances are good that you will see a toned tummy if you are already at a normal weight. If you are overweight, the healthier food choices will help you to slim down and get rid of belly fat, putting you on course for a tighter midsection.

LAZY: A MANIFESTO – By Tim Kreider

EVERYONE should read this article, written by Tim Kreider. It’s a true eye-opener.

http://www.staystrongsc.com/blog/2017/1/8/lazy-a-manifesto

If you live in America in the 21st century you’ve probably had to listen to a lot of people tell you how busy they are. It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how they’re doing: “Busy!” “So busy.” “Crazy Busy.” It is, pretty obviously, a boast disguised as a complaint. And the stock response is a kind of congratulation: “That’s a good problem to have,” or “Better than the opposite.”

This frantic, self-congratulatory busyness is a distinctly upscale affliction. Notice it isn’t generally people pulling back-to-back shifts in the ICU, taking care of their senescent parents, or holding down three minimum-wage jobs they have to commute to by bus who need to tell you how busy they are; what those people are is not busy but tiredExhausted. Dead on their feet. It’s most often said by people whose lamented busyness is purely self-imposed: work and obligations they’ve taken on voluntarily, classes and activities they’re “encouraged” their kids to participate in. They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they are addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence.

Almost everyone I know is busy. They feel anxious and guilty when they aren’t working or doing something to promote their work. They schedule in time with their friends the way 4.0 students make sure to sign up for some extracurricular activities because they look good on college applications. I recently wrote a friend asking if he wanted to do something this week, and he answered that he didn’t have a lot of time but if something was going on to let him know and maybe he could ditch work for a few hours. My question had not a preliminary heads-up to some future invitation: This was the invitation. I was hereby asking him to do something with me. But his busyness was like some vast churning noise through which he as shouting out at me, and I gave up trying to shout back over it.

I recently learned a neologism that, like political correctnessman cave, and content-provider, I instantly recognized as heralding an ugly new turn in the culture: planshopping. That is, deferring committing to any one plan for an evening until you know what all your options are, and then picking the one that’s most likely to be fun/advance your career/have the most girls at it — in other words, treating people like menu options or products in a catalog.

Even children are busy now, scheduled down to the half hour with enrichment classes, tutorials, and extracurricular activities. At the end of the day they come home as tired as grownups, which seems not just sad but hateful. I was a member of the latchkey generation, and had three hours of totally unstructured, largely unsupervised time every afternoon, time I used to do everything from scouring The World Book Encyclopedia to making animated movies to convening with friends in the woods in order to chuck dirt clods directly into one another’s eyes, all of which afforded me knowledge, skills, and insights that remain valuable to this day.

The busyness is not a necessary or inevitable condition of life; it’s something we’ve chosen, if only by our acquiescence to it. I recently Skyped with a friend who had been driven out of New York City by the rents and now has an artist’s residency in a small town in the South of France. She described herself as happy and relaxed for the first time in years. She still gets her work done, but it doesn’t consume her entire day and brain. She says it feels like college — she has a circle of friends there who all go out to the cafe or watch TV together every night. She has a boyfriend again. (She once ruefully summarized dating in New York: “Everyone is too busy and everyone thinks they can do better.”) What she had mistakenly assumed was her personality — driven, cranky, anxious, and sad — turned out to be a reformative effect of her environment, of the crushing atmospheric pressure of ambition and competitiveness. It’s not as if any of us wants to live like this, any more than any one person wants to be part of a traffic jam or stadium trampling or the hierarchy of cruelty in high school; it’s something we collectively force one another to do. It may not be a problem that’s soluble through any social reform or self-help regimen; maybe it’s just how things are. Zoologist Konrade Lorenz calls “the rushed existence into which industrialized, commercialized man has precipitated himself” and all its attendant afflictions — ulcers, hypertension, neuroses, etc. — an “inexpedient development,” or evolutionary maladaptation, brought on by our ferocious intraspecies competition. He likens us to birds whose alluringly long plumage has rendered them flightless, easy prey.

I can’t help but wonder whether all this histrionic exhaustion isn’t a way of covering up the fact that most of what we do doesn’t matter. I once dated a woman that interned at a magazine where she wan’t allowed to take lunch hours out, lest she be urgently needed. This was an entertainment magazine whose raison d’etre had been obviated when Menu buttons appeared on remotes, so it’s hard to see this pretense of indispensability as anything other than a form of institutional self-delusion. Based on the volume of my email correspondence and the amount of Internet ephemera I am forwarded on a daily basis, I suspect that most people with office jobs are doing as little as I am. More and more people in this country no longer make or do anything tangible; if your job wasn’t performed by a cat or a boa constrictor or a worm in a Tyrollean hat in a Richard Scarry book I’m not convinced it’s necessary. Yes, I know we’re all very busy, but what, exactly, is getting done? Are all those people running late for meetings and yelling on their cell phones stopping the spread of malaria or developing feasible alternatives to fossil fuels or making anything beautiful?

The busyness serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness: Obviously your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day. All this noise and rush and stress seem contrived to drown out or over up some fear at the center of our lives. I know that after I’ve spent a whole day working for running errands or answering emails or watching movies, keeping my brain busy and distracted, as soon as I lie down to sleep all the niggling quotidian worries and Big Picture questions I’ve successfully kept at bay come crowding into my brain like monsters swarming out of the closet the instant you turn off the nightlight. When you ty to meditate, your brain suddenly comes up with a list of a thousand urgent items you should be obsessing about rather than simply sit still. One of my correspondents suggests that what we’re all so afraid of is being left alone with ourselves.

I’ll say it: I am not busy. I am the laziest ambitious person I know. Like most writers, I feel like a reprobate who does not deserve to live on any day that I do not write, but I also feel like 4 or 5 hours is enough to earn my stay on the planet for one more day. On the best ordinary days of my life, I write in the morning, go for a long bike ride and run errands in the afternoon, and see friends, read or watch a movie in the evening. The very best days of my life are given over to uninterrupted debauchery, but these are, alas, undependable and increasingly difficult to arrange. This, it seems to me, is a sane and pleasant pace for a day. And if you call me up and ask whether I won’t maybe blow off work and check out the new American Wing at the Met or ogle girls in Central Park or just drink chilled pink minty cocktails all day long, I will say, “What time?”

But just recently, I insidiously started, because of professional obligation to become busy. For the first time in my life I was able to tell people, with a straight face, that I was “too busy” to do this or that thing they wanted me to do. I could see why people enjoy this complaint: It makes you feel important, sough-after, and put-upon. It’s also an unassailable excuse for declining boring invitations, shirking unwelcome projects, and avoiding human interaction. Except that I hated actually being busy. Every morning my inbox was full of emails asking me to do things I did not want to do or presenting me with problems that I had to solve. It got more and more intolerable, until finally I fled town to the Undisclosed Location from which I’m writing this.

Here I am largely unmolested by obligations. There is no TV. To check email I have to drive to the library. I go a week at a time without seeing anyone I know. I’ve remembered about buttercups, stinkbugs, and the stars. I read a lot. And I’m finally getting some real writing done for the first time in months. It’s hard to find anything to say about life without immersing yourself in the world, but it’s also just about impossible to figure out what that might be, or how best to say it, without getting the hell out of it again. I know not everyone has an isolated cabin to flee to. But not having cable or the Internet turns out to be cheaper than having them. And nature is still technically free, even if human beings have tried to make access to it expensive. Time and quiet should not be luxury items. 

Idleness is not just a vacation, an indulgence, or a vice: It is an indispensable to the brain as vitamin D is to the body, and deprived of it we suffer a mental affliction as disfiguring as rickets. The space and quiet that idleness provides is a necessary condition for standing back from life and seeing it whole, for making unexpected connections and waiting for the wild summer lightning strikes of inspiration — it is, paradoxically, necessary to getting any work done. “Idle dreaming is often the essence of what we do,” writes Thomas Pynchon in his essay on Sloth. Archimedes’ “Eureka” in the bath, Newton’s apple, Jekyll and Hyde, the benzine ring: history is full of stories of inspiration that came in idle moments and dreams. It almost makes you wonder whether loafers, goldbrickers, and no-accounts aren’t responsible for more of the world’s great ideas, inventions, and masterpieces than the hardworking.

“The goal of the future is full unemployment, so we can play. That’s why we have to destroy the present politico-economic system.” This may sound like the pronouncement of some bong-smoking anarchist, but it was in fact Arthur C. Clarke, who found time between scuba diving and pinball games to write Childhood’s End and think up communications satellites. Ted Rall recently wrote a column proposing that we divorce income form work, giving each citizen a guaranteed paycheck, which sounds like the kind of lunatic notion that’ll be a basic human right in about a century, like abolition, universal suffrage, and 8-hour workdays. I know how heretical it sound in America, but there’s really no reason we shouldn’t regard drudgery as an evil to rid the world of if possible, like polio. It was the Puritans who perverted work into a virtue, evidently forgetting that God invented it as a punishment. Now that the old taskmaster is out of office, maybe we could all take a long smoke break.

I suppose the world would soon slide to ruin if everyone behaved like me. But I would suggest that an ideal human life lies somewhere between my own defiant indolence and the rest of the world’s endless frenetic hustle. My own life has admittedly been absurdly cushy. But my privileged position outside the hive may have given me a unique perspective on it. It’s like being the designated driver at a bar: When you’re not drinking, ou can see drunkenness more clearly than those actually experiencing it. Unfortunately the only advice I have to offer the Busy is as unwelcome as the advice you’d give to the Drunk. I’m not suggesting everyone quit their jobs — just maybe take the rest of the day off. Go play some see-ball. Fuck in the middle of the afternoon. Take your daughter to a matinee. My role in life is to be a bad influence, the kid standing outside the classroom window making faces at you at your desk, urging you to just this once to make some excuse and get out of there, come outside and play.

Even though my own resolute idleness has mostly been a luxury rather than a virtue, I did make a conscious decision, a long time ago, to choose time over money, since you can always make more money. And I’ve always understood that the best investment of my limited time on earth is to spend it with people I love. I suppose it’s possible I’ll lie on my deathbed regretting that I didn’t work harder, write more, and say everything I had to say, but I think what I’ll really wish is that I could have one more round of Delanceys with Nick, another long late-night talk with Lauren, one last hard laugh with Harold. Life is too short to be busy.