I’m honored to be a part of this fantastic project which is now available through Amazon Prime Video! Best yet, Season 1 is available to watch for FREE to Amazon Prime members. Hosted by CSCS, IFBB Pro, martial artist and actor Ian Lauer.
Click on the link below to access all 13 episodes in Season 1!
No one should have to live like this!
The phrase which I have used for the title of this post is one which always intrigued me, perhaps mostly due to the fact that I grew up in a household in which various areas were “clutter zones”. This is not to say that I grew up in a messy home. My mom was actually quite tidy, and a neat freak. But I never saw more than half the surface of the dining room table, since the other half was covered with one foot high stacks of bank statements, other financial documents, greeting cards and letters from family. In like fashion, about a third of our coffee table was piled with astrology guides, tv guides, and other books which my mom was reading. Stacks of papers and magazines sat next to our living room sofa. My mom’s bedroom had banker’s boxes instead of furniture at the foot of the bed.
I also was witness to my mom’s extensive collection of jewelry and clothing. Though we had six closets, only one was filled with my clothing, while all the rest were jam-packed with my mother’s clothing. Some of the clothing had never been worn and had the price tags still attached. I admit that I knew this behavior was unusual, but I did not know how pervasive such behavior was in my mom’s family until I went to Hawaii and saw that my aunts and uncles also practiced the same behavior. Some of my relatives were so extreme in their tendency to hold onto things that they earned the label of pack rats. In fact, when one of my uncles had a severe stroke and had to be placed in a convalescent home, my cousins discovered five-foot high stacks of newspapers throughout the house in a serpentine pattern (leaving just enough room for a person to wiggle through the house), moldy food in the refrigerator, Japanese antiques which were stuffed in a room collecting dust, and a plethora of other collectibles and junk which made it next to impossible for him to use the kitchen, toilet or sleep in his bed.
When my mom became ill in 2006 and had to be placed in a convalescent home, the task of cleaning her apartment fell upon me. The enormity of sorting through all the things my mother had collected was overwhelming, and I shut down emotionally numerous times. I was shocked to find collectibles that had never been displayed, bank statements going as far back as the 1950’s, hundreds of pairs of earrings and shoes, about 150 handbags, etc. Suddenly it was left up to me to determine what items of my mom’s were worthy of being kept. Since these items could not be stored at the nursing home, they were stored in my garage and my closet. My mom still asks about her things and becomes angry if I tell her that we had to sell or give away many of the items she had collected over the decades. I did my best to keep what she deemed most valuable, either monetarily speaking or in terms of sentimental value. It always breaks my heart when I see her upset over losing her things.
My favorite aunt, two years older than my mother, was probably the worst-stricken in the family when it came to hoarding. She never had children and was a widow for 34 years when she finally passed away in 2017 at the age of 86 from ALS. Before she became ill, I remember hyperventilating upon entering her house, because the clutter was so extreme. I used to marvel at her insistence on keeping 60 plastic Smurf miniatures in her tiny bathroom, and used to wonder why she had a collection of about 200 plastic food storage containers when she lived alone. My aunt’s collections were numerous and extensive.
If you have ever tuned into the show “Hoarders” you would get a sense of what my aunt’s environment was like. My aunt’s belongings swallowed up her living space so severely that she was unable to stretch out on her bed, and could barely get to her toilet because there was so much junk in the bathroom. My aunt didn’t have access to her front door for over ten years because she had so much junk stacked up in front of it. Instead, she used the side door leading out from the kitchen to access her residence.
In January of this year I had to move from a place I had been in for close to six years. Though I have gone through my entire adult life very successfully squashing any hoarding tendencies that may be hidden in my genetic makeup, I had still acquired many things over the years. Once I was in the new place and had to sort through everything, I was ready to enter full purge mode, and got rid of a lot of things I no longer needed, and it felt FANTASTIC. That is saying a lot since I go through the bulk of my belongings three to four times a year and perform regular purges.
When it comes to your belongings, don’t allow yourself to become encumbered by them. Don’t hold onto feelings of guilt. If you haven’t used something in a while and it is collecting dust, get rid of it. There is probably someone out there who will use it and will appreciate it. If there is something you haven’t used or worn because you are waiting for the right occasion, either USE IT or let it go! I used to frequently argue with my mom about our differing philosophies about objects. She always told me I was hard on things. Scratches on my watches and my shoes were deemed by my mom to be marks of carelessness, when in contrast, my mom sequestered similar items in boxes and tissue paper for decades, never to be worn or used, in a static, pristine state and hidden under a bed or a drawer. I will continue to use the things I possess and will not worry about wear and tear. I will also make sure that tables and all the living areas of my house serve only their intended purposes, and that my storage areas never get to the point where they are overflowing.
If you know a hoarder, please GET HELP. http://hoardershelp.org/
Copyright: goodluz / 123RF Stock Photo
By: Dr. Stacey Naito – Physician and IFBB Pro
The Shifting Tide
Those of you about to turn the corner and enter the 40 and over zone may be concerned about the impact that getting older will have on your sex life. You may have questions about whether you must resign yourself to becoming a dried-up old lady, with no fun to be had in the bedroom. Thankfully, the reality is that you can have more fulfilling and enjoyable sex than you had in your 20’s or 30’s.
What’s more, society has gotten wind of the idea that people want to live completely fulfilled lives into their advanced years. It’s true that 40 has become the new 20, and the concept is supported by empowered celebrities like J. Lo proclaiming their eternal youth and sexual vitality without shame. So instead of allowing the aging process to shut you down, it’s time to look forward to a new and more sexually fulfilling chapter in your life.
Why Getting Older Is Great For Your Sex Life
I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t trade the knowledge and life experience I obtained over my 52 years on the planet to return to my 20’s, because aging has positively impacted every aspect of my life, including what happens behind closed doors. With age comes acceptance of who we are, body flaws and all. Let’s face it, we accumulate stretch marks, cellulite, scars, etc. over time, all of which could send us into a meltdown if we stressed out about them. We have become more comfortable with who we are, which translates to greater body confidence. That body confidence works to our advantage in the bedroom, because we no longer feel uneasy or ashamed of how we look sans clothing. When we are comfortable naked, we can finally relax and enjoy intimate encounters to the fullest.
A woman in her 40’s or 50’s is less likely to take desperate measures to entice her man, such as dressing up in sexy but uncomfortable lingerie, or wearing a pair of high heels guaranteed to aggravate her plantar fasciitis or her bad back. In contrast, it seems there are plenty of women in younger age brackets who follow ridiculous wardrobe guidelines to garner the attention of potential sex partners or followers on social media channels. A woman in her 40’s of beyond doesn’t have the inclination to make a fool out of herself to guarantee a romp in the bedroom. She is older, wiser, and doesn’t have time for such nonsense. She doesn’t feel like she needs to try so hard to win her partner’s favor. Her attitude tends to be more along the lines of, “This is what I got, take it or leave it.” Besides, I am willing to bet that such an attitude is far sexier to a man these days. In addition, most men tend to be more excited about the notion of getting you naked, and once you are in the buff, they aren’t scrutinizing your body for flaws.
Older women are also less selfish in bed, and bolder about declaring what they want. They know their bodies, their likes and dislikes. If single, they are more discerning about how they procure partners, so they are less likely to engage in risky activities which expose them to sexually transmitted diseases. For older women in a relationship, there is a greater likelihood that they have been with the same partner for many years, and have developed a level of intimacy which only comes from a longer term committed relationship. A 40-something woman is usually confident enough to turn to her partner and say, “I really like it when you use your hands on me more”, and not fret about whether her partner will accept her sexual preferences.
Chances are that for older women, there are far fewer household distractions which can impede the natural progression of an afternoon of flirting into a full-blown lovemaking session. Such interludes are pretty much impossible if a baby is crying, or young children are demanding attention. Once children have become old enough to be relatively independent, say from pre-teens on, there may be more opportunities to roll around in the sheets with your partner without any interruptions. That kind of freedom can result in more spontaneous sexual encounters and greater satisfaction.
For those past menopause, Aunt Flo’s monthly visit no longer interferes with any amorous advances. Furthermore, there is no concern about getting pregnant and having an unplanned family addition. It’s incredibly liberating.
Sexual Issues and Aging
Though I have painted a rosy picture of the sex life of older women, there are some issues which can interfere with optimal sexual activity. However, this doesn’t mean that all women over 40 will experience sexual dysfunction. As geriatric psychiatrist and Caring.com senior editor Ken Robbins states, “Impaired sexuality and sexual function aren’t normal consequences of aging.” (https://www.caring.com/articles/sexless-after-40).
Women can experience symptoms of perimenopause as early as 35, and the diminishing estrogen and progesterone levels can result in vaginal dryness and thinning of the vaginal mucosa, both of which can make intercourse painful. If this occurs, make sure to obtain a pelvic exam with a physician who can diagnose and treat the condition. In many cases, a lubricant is sufficient, but hormone replacement therapy may be offered as an option as well.
Some women may experience a decrease in sexual desire as they age, but many others experience a surge in libido from the increased testosterone to estrogen ratio, which increases as estrogen levels continue to diminish. The sexual benefits of testosterone are also enhanced by regular weight training, which naturally boosts testosterone levels in the body. However, the ebb and flow of sexual desire often fluctuates more in women over the age of 40, a result of associated dips and surges in hormonal levels. In addition, the hot flashes, night sweats, and mood swings associated with plummeting progesterone levels don’t exactly make a woman feel amorous.
If you are a woman over 40 who is experiencing symptoms of perimenopause, such as hot flashes, and they are frequent enough to disrupt your daily life, seek the advice of a physician. During your visit, you may ask if the addition of hormonal support supplements like maca or dihydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) would be helpful in decreasing the symptoms you are experiencing.
Most importantly, reduce stress in your daily life, get plenty of rest, and communicate with your partner about any sexual concerns you may have.
Photo credit: Pixabay.com
Please check out this excellent article by Shiela Olson which explores the delicate balance between pushing yourself to the next level and nurturing yourself at the same time.
– By Sheila Olson of fitsheila.com
You’ve decided you’re ready to stop perpetuating a cycle of sleeping in on weekends, spending weeknights slumped over in your couch, and eating out at greasy burger joints every other meal. You’re ready to live a healthier and happier lifestyle, and you’ve known the answer all along — diet and exercise. Diets aren’t very effective when practiced every other week, and fitness requires you to keep up and even build up the intensity over time.
So, what’s the secret?
The Importance of Prolonging Good Fitness
When someone decides they are ready to start running every day, or some other form of exercise, they typically feel this fire within themselves to keep it up. You go in for your first day, and you feel exhausted, but you also still feel pretty good knowing that you’ve taken your first step at getting healthy. After a few more gym sessions, you notice that you aren’t just tired but also sore, and that goodwill for better living starts to feel a little less compelling.
It’s natural to give it your all the first few times before your mind and body start to naturally resist the transformation that is occurring. It’s the kind of transformation that people from all walks of life seek to make their lives better. It’s why so many recovering addicts start running and bodybuilding. Exercise not only changes how we look on the outside but how we feel on the inside. It reduces stress and boosts positive self-image and confidence.
The process of transformation can be difficult and uncomfortable at times, especially when you’re just starting out, which is why it is important to not overdo it. If you work too hard or put too much emphasis on your physical fitness, you run the risk of burning out and not making the kind of progress you are looking for.
The Meaning Behind Self-Care
Right now, the buzzword of the day seems to be self-care. People are starting to collectively realize that we don’t need to punish ourselves to live our best lives. Exercise shouldn’t be something you dread to do but something you look forward to. To remedy this natural resistance to living healthier and a fitness-oriented lifestyle, people are turning to self-care as a way to supplement diet and exercise and avoid burning out during the process.
One of the ways you can practice self-care is by leaving plenty of rest days in between workouts to give your body time to recover. Recovery is essential to practicing good physical fitness and ensuring you have enough energy to keep going back to grind week after week. Self-care also addresses showing yourself love in alternative ways. Exercise is important for our physical health, but we also need to consider our mental and emotional health as well. Beyond exercise, there are a number of activities you can do, such as meditation, reading a book, or pursuing a hobby, that can all fill a specific need you have in your life.
The Need for Balance in Your Life
When you approach your physical fitness as just one piece of the puzzle, then you can start looking at other ways to enhance your life, while not overdoing your diet and exercise. You won’t just be working hard, you’ll be working smart. You’ll know that there are many activities you can work on to improve your overall well-being. By balancing out these different self-care activities, you will always make yourself better while also keeping a very diverse routine. Some days, you will be focused on your physical fitness, but when you need to rest and recover, you can then switch gears and focus on your mental and emotional health as well.
Once you decide it’s time to make a change, you’ve already started your journey to improve your wellness. You may have attempted to change your life a few times now, but all of those past experiences were just the lead up to this one moment where you finally committed to achieving personal wellness and living your best life.
Photo Credit: Pixabay.com
Check out my new video in which I talk about some great new products from Gallon Gear!
Copyright: stnazkul / 123RF Stock Photo
Ever since we hit the era of Google and the information superhighway, we have become as spoiled as fattened swine on the plethora of technology which swarms around us constantly. It’s been an interesting study in contrasts for me, because I spent my childhood without any of the fancy technological bells and whistles which earmark the new millennium. I remember making and receiving phone calls on a beige rotary dial phone, and if I didn’t want to talk to someone, I just left the receiver off the cradle. Now THAT was call blocking! We didn’t even have the luxury of answering machines back in those days. And tooling around on personal computers wasn’t part of our daily routine either.
Now we have personal computers which are so handy that we carry them around in the form of laptops, tablets, and cell phones. We navigate via global satellite, search for factoids via Google or Bing, and pretty much have the world quite literally in the palms of our hands.
Yet what happens when a phone runs out of battery power, or if a power outage threatens to shut us down? The thought honestly makes me shudder, and is part of the reason why I will never take the advice of my sister and digitize all of the photos from my photo albums (I have 39 photo albums, mostly from my mother’s photo collection), then destroy the original photos to save space in my home. Yes, a fire could destroy those photos, but I am not too keen on the idea of storing images on a disk or hard drive and relying on a computer whenever I want to view those images.
Today’s society is so image-driven, yet who is bothering to save these captures in a precious archive? Though I have a habit of printing out images from important events (like birthdays and holidays), I’m sure I am in the minority. I have also noticed that there are some online searches I have conducted which are later deleted or moved, so the information is forever lost. Maybe I’m old school, but there’s something to be said about holding onto an item, whether it be a printed photo, a printout of a Google search, or financial documents.
How often do you agree to do something when you are either completely unmotivated to do it, or are so over-burdened by other responsibilities that you feel like you are shackling yourself to an impossible schedule? Maybe you’re known as the “nicest person” who always manages to make time for everybody no matter what. And maybe you don’t want people to think otherwise about you, despite the fact that your energy and your patience are worn thin by people who always seem to drain the very lifeblood from you, and expect you to do everything for them at the drop of a hat.
Have you ever considered using the word NO once in a while? By setting limits and boundaries, you will keep energy vampires at bay, and you give yourself a chance to balance out your life so that you don’t burn yourself out. I am sure that the people who have taken your availability for granted will be stunned when you respond to a request with NO, but they’ll get used to it. Whenever I gather the courage to refuse a request, a feeling of complete relief washes over me, especially if I feel like I am drowning in the wide expanse of my to-do list.
When you refuse a request, task, or invitation, you finally allow yourself to take a break. As long as you aren’t shirking responsibilities, you absolutely should feel like you deserve to clear the space around you, especially if you are in dire need of recharging your own batteries. There’s something I say to patients quite frequently, and that is, remember to put the oxygen mask over your OWN face. If you don’t nurture yourself, you won’t perform as well in all the roles you play in your life, whether it’s employee, boss, parent, spouse, etc.
It’s completely acceptable to draw the line in the sand, and to establish boundaries which preserve your sense of self and which keep your life, and your spirit, balanced and happy. If you are having difficulty asserting yourself and getting to the power of NO, then try this: whenever someone asks you for a favor or invites you somewhere, just say that you need to think about it or check your schedule, which is not a lie, and that you will let that person know soon. That gives you a window of time to evaluate the situation, and to determine if you have the time or the resources to accommodate the invitation or request.
Another important consideration is whether you have the inclination to take part in the task or event. Be honest with yourself! I see too many people agree to do things they don’t want to do, then they are steeped in misery. This doesn’t give you permission to be difficult, selfish, or uncooperative, but it certainly gives you some breathing room. If your heart isn’t in it, then don’t do it!
Remember that you will be better equipped to serve others if you take care of yourself first.
Copyright: whiteboxmedia / 123RF Stock Photo
During a recent urgent care shift, I encountered a man in his mid-50’s who had presented to the center with complaints of sinus pressure and cough. After I gathered more history and conducted a physical exam, the patient went on a tangent, asking me numerous questions about healthy foods. A commercial construction foreman, he was accustomed to being on site during the day, and insisted that his daily lunch was quite healthy and acceptable. As he prepared to tell me about this daily meal, he beamed with pride. What was it? Several slices of ham from the refrigerated section of the supermarket, a few slices of cheese, and a handful of pickles. He truly believed that the meal he consumed daily was incredibly healthy and nutritious. He even stated that he was consuming a high protein meal with produce (the pickle). The patient went on to tell me that when he was done with work, he often stopped at Arby’s to pick up a sandwich for dinner, and felt that the animal protein from these sandwiches wasn’t harmful in the least.
I shake my head in amazement when I encounter patients who have completely convinced themselves that somehow, their eating habits are completely clean and healthy, when they are actually abysmally deficient in nutritional value. What is more surprising is how insistent these people are on continuing their unhealthy habits, even when they ask for advice. The patient I mentioned above listened to me discuss the power of food as fuel, as sustenance, and nodded when I suggested he visit the fresh produce section of local grocery stores, select uncured meats, and avoid frequenting fast food establishments like Arby’s. I also mentioned that his blood pressure readings of 181/125, 179/127, and 185/122 (non-symptomatic) were rather alarming, especially since he stated that he had “forgotten” to take his blood pressure medications that morning. Was it fair to shake him out of his fog and inform him that with malignant hypertension, and a diet sure to compound the problem, he was on a short course to an unfavorable event like a stroke or heart attack? Did he even care if he was at high risk?
This is the kind of situation which I as a physician must often dance around. I have to determine how receptive a patient is to advice, and I also have to figure out the best way to speak to the patient without offending or discouraging him or her. It can be very tricky to reason with someone who has most likely gone through his entire life somehow believing that ham, cheese and pickles constitute an acceptable daily meal in anyone’s life!
If you are looking for that fire which will encourage you to reach out towards your fitness, wellness and life goals, then be sure to tune into the motivating, inspiring podcasts at https://micro.fit/ where the motto is, “For big results, think small”. That’s right…small changes in your lifestyle can create dramatic results in your life!
I am honored to be one of the featured podcasters for this wonderful app! My podcast runs on Fridays, so be sure to check it out each week for new topics and fresh perspectives on life balance, goal setting, motivation and fulfillment.
Click on this link to access the podcast page directly:
I love this company, and wanted to share a special February deal which they are running…
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