About a month ago, I went on a date with a man I will call Oliver. We started out with drinks, and as the evening progressed, we had a nice dinner, all the while enjoying stimulating conversation. I was actually excited about the prospect of seeing him again. Then one of my 14 year old cats became ill and died within several days, and my attention was diverted away from Oliver. I was very honest with him and told him I needed the weekend to process the death of my beloved cat, but he was insistent and kept pressuring me to pay attention to him, which only aggravated me. He finally backed off, and I contacted him at the beginning of the following week. We exchanged some nice sentiments via text, and I let him know that I was open to seeing him again.
About ten days passed without a peep from Oliver, so I contacted him to say hello. He informed me that his mother was ill with pneumonia, and that he had been at her home taking care of her. I expressed my wishes for his mother’s recovery, and told him to let me know when he was available. I heard from him three days later, on a Thursday, when he sent me this text:
I want to make it up to you because I like you and I feel that there’s a good connection between us. So please consider this, if you have any time over the weekend, I would love to see you over the weekend if not the beginning of the week. Give us a chance, OK? I will make it up to you Stacey.
Oliver ghosted me for another ten days, then suddenly popped up with text messages like, “I want to marry you”. It was as if he was incapable of exhibiting consistent behavior, which was a major turn-off for me. One morning, he asked me to give him a day on which we could have a second date, so I accommodated his request. Just as I expected, he completely ghosted me on the day he had selected for our second date, so I gave him a piece of my mind via text and blocked the jerk.
It’s always a good idea to read invitations carefully, as this story will emphasize!
My friend Karla received an invitation to a bridal shower. When she scanned over the invite, she read that all guests were asked to bring a bread to the event. In an effort to make sure that the bread she got was special, Karla trekked over to a bakery which sold Häsi bread, a specialty sourdough bread which is saturated with turmeric and butterfly pea flower to create a distinctive blue and yellow coloring which is both striking and delicious. Feeling quite proud of her selection, Karla made her way over to the bridal shower.
When Karla arrived at the bridal shower, she noticed that there were about 50 people there, but she didn’t see any other loaves of bread at the party. What she did notice was that there was a large tray on a table, filled with about 50 beads, some made of clear glass, some made of plastic, some made of stone. Karla asked the bride what all the beads were for, and was told that people had been asked to bring BEADS to the shower so that the bride could string them all together and make a keepsake necklace.
The best part of this completely true story is that the bride had celiac disease, and would have never asked anyone to bring bread to an event!
The hype about Wagyu beef is legitimate, and I am definitely a fan. I will admit that I was concerned when I saw how Wagyu beef has marbling woven throughout the meat, but oddly enough, wagyu beef is higher in monounsaturated fat than other types of beef, with lower overall calories as well. Another plus of Wagyu beef which is a result of the extensive fine marbling is that it cooks very quickly, making it a splendid choice for hot pot meals and Korean barbeque.
Japan is so strict about how Wagyu beef is graded that even a USDA Prime grade in the United States is considered only a four on the five-point Japanese scale for Wagyu. In addition, only beef from certain breeds even qualifies as Wagyu. As a beef lover, I am always impressed by the texture of A5 Wagyu beef, which is the highest grade afforded to Wagyu, but the flavor is also so refined and delectable that there is no way I could ever pass up an opportunity to consume it. I don’t even like loading up much on sauces or other condiments, because I don’t want anything to interfere with the nuances of the Wagyu. A very apt description of the flavor of A5 Wagyu can be found at Eataly Toronto:
“You’ll find that it has a buttery, yet firm texture and lustrous, red colour It’s a very juicy style of beef with some serious umami flavour. Although it has a strong beefy taste, it’s more “sweet” than “greasy.””
Back in March of this year, I attended my very first rave, a smaller event which was held indoors at a theater in downtown Los Angeles. What surprised me was how loving, accepting, and cool just about everyone was at the event and how consistent they were with PLUR, an acronym which stands for Peace, Love, Unity, and Respect. It was as if all judgement, criticism, pretense and posturing had been left at the entrance to the event, and I have to admit that it was refreshing and lovely. I was so enraptured by the energy at the event and so into the music that I was left wanting more when it was time to leave.
I have to admit that I am a bit hesitant to attend the larger, outdoor festivals, for a number of reasons which are well detailed here. It just doesn’t seem like it would be very fun to sit in a Porta-Potty with a full length bodysuit gathered around my ankles, nor does it seem like fun to have a bunch of strangers sweating on me while I dance to electronic music. It was already quite stuffy and hot while I was at the indoor venue, and that was during a part of the year when the outside temperature was in the upper 40’s Fahrenheit. Bear in mind that it is customary and almost required that attendees dress scantily, primarily to offset the increased ambient temperature which develops as a result of all the human bodies gyrating and dancing together in a small space, and also as a proclamation of body awareness and acceptance.
Despite the fact that the venue was pretty packed, and the ambient temperature was pretty toasty, I had an incredible time, and can’t wait to attend another rave. There is something so liberating about dancing without a care in the world, moving with the beat of the music, and feeling absolutely no judgement from other people at the event. It was also fun to dress up, especially because it has been years since I have dressed up for Halloween or masquerade balls. Raves are a fantastic way for adults to align with their childlike energy, and let go.
Have you ever wondered how old your cat was? There is an updated formula which replaces the outdated 7 human years per cat year which provides a more accurate assessment of a cat’s development. The first year of a cat’s life is equivalent to 14 human years, the second year is equivalent to 10 human years, and every year thereafter is equivalent to 4 human years. For example, a 18-year-old cat would be equivalent to an 80-year-old human.
In recent years, feline life-stages have been redefined as well to more accurately reflect their growth and development over the years. Kittenhood is defined as the period from birth to 6 months of age, a junior is between 7 months to 2 years of age, a young adult is between 3 to 6 years of age, a mature cat is between 7 to 10 years old, senior cats are between 11 to 14 years of age, and super senior or geriatric cats are 15 years old or older.
Mixed breed cats tend to live longer than purebred cats, with an average lifespan of 14 years compared to 12.5 years for purebred cats. The most common cause of death in cats over 5 years old is kidney disease, with over 13% of cats succumbing to kidney failure. Out of the 13 cats I have had over the span of 37 years, three of them passed away as a result of kidney disease, so I am acutely aware of this statistic.
However, I met two cats in the past who beat the averages, with one cat at 25 years of age, and another who was a ripe old 29 years of age. Both cats were extremely frail and only had the energy to sleep, eat, drink, and take care of excretory functions, but it was impressive to see that they were still alive at such advanced ages.
Supposedly, the oldest cat was Creme Puff, who lived 38 years, from August 3, 1967 until August 6, 2005. There are several cats who are still alive at this point, the oldest of whom is Great Grandma Wad who is 36 years old. The oldest cat who is still alive who was verified by Guiness Book of World Records is Flossie, who was born on December 29, 1995.
On May 12, 2023, I lost Kazu, my 14-year old European Burmese who was truly the most incredible cat I have ever had. She had countless adorable habits, including hopping instead of walking downstairs, performing somersaults on the stairs on a daily basis, and lying in a human’s lap on her back with all four limbs perched in mid-air, purring so fiercely that her limbs would move in rhythm with the rumble. One of my favorite things about Kazu was the fact that she would sleep next to me every night, throughout the night, and her purr motor would start up as soon as she saw my eyes open in the morning. There were also times when Kazu would be the big spoon, putting her cute little paws on my back and nestling in my hair as I slept on my side turned away from her.
Every night, Kazu would bound up the stairs to our bedroom, hop onto the bed, wait for me to settle in under the covers and lift them for her, then she would get into position so that her body would be under the covers and her head would be either on my shoulder, arm, or on the pillow next to me, with her body snuggled up right next to mine. It’s no surprise that I haven’t been able to sleep very well since she passed. What’s even more remarkable is that I had three cats in succession from 1988 through 2023 who were my bed buddies, and all of them were my “little spoons”.
The first little spoon I had was Pebbles, a tortie who was full of tortie sass, had a loud purr similar to Kazu’s which could be heard from an adjacent room, and who would sleep next to me through the night every night. She was in my life from 1988 until 2000, when kidney disease took her from me. Before Pebbles died, I got a blue silver patched spotted tabby and white Scottish Fold kitten in November 2000 and named her Sophie. Little did I know that Sophie would soon take over as my little spoon, curling up next to me, often in the crook of my arm, and sleep throughout the night that way.
My Scottish Fold Sophie…
Sophie developed polycystic kidney disease at the age of 9, in 2009, which was when I got Kazu. When Sophie died in late 2009, Kazu had not yet developed any consistent bed habits, but before long, she began sleeping next to me in bed, and became my third little spoon. Anyone who is lucky enough to have a cat who sleeps snuggled up next to them throughout the night is blessed indeed, and I had three cats do that over the span of 35 years. I certainly hope to experience that again in the future.
If you have money invested in traditional bank savings accounts, you’re doing yourself a major disservice, because the average APY (Annual Percentage Yield) is currently at 0.23% according to CNET’s sister site Bankrate. In startk contrast, high yield online savings accounts from sites such as CIT Bank offer APY’s over 4% (CIT Bank’s current rate is 4.85% APY for balances of $5,000 or more). I have parked emergency funds and other savings into high yield savings accounts for about 8 years now, and would never consider putting my money into the paltry savings vehicles which traditional banks offer.
Let’s take the APY rates of 0.23% and 4.85% to provide a comparison between traditional savings accounts and high yield onling savings accounts. If $1,000 is invested in an account earning 0.23% APY, the account balance after 12 months will be $1,002.30, while $1,000 invested in an account earning 4.85% APY will have a balance after 12 months of $1,048.54. I’m sure anyone would be happier with having an additional $48 at the end of the year as opposed to $2!
Another investment alternative which actually has slightly higher yields than high yield savings accounts is a certificate of deposit (CD), but the downside is that the funds are locked up for a designated period of time. If you have money which you are willing to set aside into a CD, you might want to consider this investment vehicle. At least with a high yield savings account, you can withdraw funds rather quickly without penalty should the need arise. Some individuals who are accustomed to brick and mortar banks and traditional ATM machines won’t like this option, but I am sure that eventually, physical bank locations will go the way of the dinosaur, so it makes sense to get used to performing transactions online.
The other thing to consider is that the APY at online banks which offer high yield savings options can and does frequently fluctuate. However, accounts at such institutions are FDIC insured for up to $250,000, a comforting fact when trying to figure out how to protect one’s savings in these tumultuous financial times. At the very least, high yield savings accounts provide a means by which one’s money can keep pace with inflation.
Check out the Hot Logic Mini XP, which has a built-in food storage compartment in addition to the fantastic food heating technology of the original Hot Logic Mini!
All you need is an electrical outlet (you can even use a car inverter and heat up meals while you drive). This is FANTASTIC for work, travel, trade shows, photo shoots, etc.
To order a Hot Logic Mini or Hot Logic Mini XP, go to the following link:
I am sure that many of you are aware of companies which are very aggressive with their advertising on social media platforms like Instagram, and which often convince people to purchase from them. Then if there is an issue with the items once they arrive, the company will renege on their promise to honor returns, despite the fact that their return policy clearly states that customers are able to return items with no issues. I have dealt with such companies before, and without exception, the companies are always based in China.
I recently placed two orders from Bella Barnett, never suspecting that the company would give me a hard time if I needed to return anything. I made sure to look up the return and exchange policy on the website:
General Terms
For all situations including that the outfits don’t fit, Bella Barnett will gladly accept returns or exchanges of new, unworn, unwashed, and unaltered merchandise with all original internal garment tags days within 28 days of the delivery of your items. There is a removable padding in all swimwear to protect you. For hygienic reasons, swimwear with no hygienic padding is unable to be returned.
Please do not return the package to the address on the waybill, that is not the return address. Otherwise no refund will be given!
It’s important to note that shipping costs are not covered by Bella Barnett when sent back, and we are unable to provide shipping labels. The return address is in New Jersey, USA. Please be sure to tell us the item that needs to be returned or exchanged and get the return address before you return it, also, you need to include your order number on the return form and give us the tracking number after sending the item back. No refunds will be given for those who cannot provide a tracking number. When we receive your returned items and determine that they are in returnable condition (new, unworn, unwashed, and unaltered merchandise with all original internal garment tags), refunds or exchanges will begin. For products with quality problems, we will take a full refund/partial refund, if you don’t want to send it back and get a refund, you may need to provide us with a picture of the product to get a refund.
Refunds
Refunds are usually returned within 7 days via the original method of payment(requests for refunds to other credit cards/accounts for any reason will not be accepted), or even within 24 hours if you paid via PayPal. If the returns are not caused by our fault(quality problem, color difference, wrong shipment), we will not refund the postage.
I received one order and was happy with the item, but the second order consisted of an item which was poorly made and didn’t look like what was pictured on the website. I followed the instructions which were detailed on the website for returns and sent them an email describing the item that I wanted to return, and asked them to provide a return address. This is the response I received:
On Wednesday, April 5, 2023 at 05:14:02 PM PDT, contact@bellabarnett.com <contact@bellabarnett.com> wrote:
Dear Customer,
Could you please tell us how does not fit？Whether it is too big or too small? We can first seek whether there are other solutions. Thanks.
By that time, I already suspected that I was dealing with a China-based company, and that they would try to convince me not to send back the item. I responded to their email by stating that the item was poorly made, didn’t look like what was pictured on the website, and looked horrible when I tried it on. Instead of honoring my return request, this was Bella Barnett’s reply:
On Thursday, April 6, 2023 at 05:18:35 AM PDT, contact@bellabarnett.com <contact@bellabarnett.com> wrote:
Dear Customer,
Sorry to keep you waiting. Considering that shipping or cross-country shipping can be expensive, we can make an exception and provide you with an alternative solution once. You can pick another item at similar price on our website and we will send it to you for free. You do not need to return the original item either. If you want an item with a price difference of more than $5 from the original item, you will need to make up the difference.Please let me know which item you want if you accpet this solution. Once the free replacement is sent out, we will no longer accept any return requests. Please be advised. If you still want to send it back please let us know and we will send you the return address.
By that time I was pretty aggravated and didn’t want to continue to argue with them, so I told them to send another jacket which had arrived in the first order, which was actually $10 cheaper than the item I wanted to return to them. However, I also made sure to tell them that I would never order anything from them again. I honestly don’t understand why such companies are so manipulative, because I am sure that they lose customers like me pretty frequently.
To you ladies who are considering purchasing clothing from Bella Barnett, BEWARE!
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